recovering sexually

[jackques]

i recently opened up to my partner about how my trauma is beginning to resurface, and i asked if we could put a pause on any sexual activities because i dont trust my ability to properly consent. my partner was extremely understanding, but there's still that nagging fear that there's only "so long" that someone can wait for me to deal with my trauma.

how long have some of you taken before you were comfortable with sex again? did the comfort just come gradually ?

i feel like i could go my whole life without having sex again and it makes me feel broken as a person. would love some input

 

[somerandomguy]

I unwillingly put my sex life on hold for five years. My wife wasn't happy, and neither was I. I didn't know why I couldn't have sex. It turned out to be trauma from my sexual abuse. Once I got into trauma therapy, things slowly got better.

Get into therapy with a qualified trauma therapist. Don't risk your relationship. If your partner sees you working on the problem, they're likely to be a lot more sensitive and grant you a lot more time to deal with it than if you just unilaterally bring all sex to a halt.

 

[jackques]

I unwillingly put my sex life on hold for five years. My wife wasn't happy, and neither was I. I didn't know why I couldn't have sex. It turned out to be trauma from my sexual abuse. Once I got into trauma therapy, things slowly got better.

Get into therapy with a qualified trauma therapist. Don't risk your relationship. If your partner sees you working on the problem, they're likely to be a lot more sensitive and grant you a lot more time to deal with it than if you just unilaterally bring all sex to a halt.

thank you, this is good input. currently, i'm seeing a therapist, but he doesn't specialize in trauma therapy, so i'm thinking of finding someone who will better help me with working through my trauma.