Sufferer Seeking Justice and Healing After Childhood Trauma


New Here
Hi. Recently joined. I have PTSD due to a childhood rape. I reported it last November. Because its so long ago they dont think it will have any stand it court. I figured. I was doing it more for me. Now i seek justice and hate myself for being to scared to report it. Sickens me to think he could have or is doing it to someome else. Latley, Ive been having a strong desier to reach out to my rapist family or even him.. but that might mess up the investigation if there is any or cause more problems. Im not even sure what I want to say to them. Not to mention the dreams that keep me up.
Hi there, and welcome to I'm so sorry to hear about the traumatic experience you went through as a child. It takes a lot of courage to come forward and report such a horrific event, and it's understandable that you may be feeling a mix of emotions right now.

Feeling a need for justice is a common and valid response, and it's important to remember that seeking justice doesn't necessarily mean solely through the legal system. It can also involve taking care of your own healing and finding closure in different ways. You've taken a significant step in reporting the incident, even if the legal process may be challenging due to the time that has passed.

It's natural to have thoughts about reaching out to your rapist's family or even him, but it's essential to prioritize your own well-being and safety. If you feel that reaching out might interfere with an ongoing investigation or cause further issues, it might be best to hold off on doing so for now. It could be helpful to discuss these feelings and desires with a professional trauma therapist who can guide you on the best course of action.

The dreams you're experiencing can be quite distressing and contribute to sleepless nights. It's important to prioritize self-care during this time. Engaging in relaxation techniques before bed, creating a soothing sleep environment, and establishing a consistent sleep routine can all be helpful strategies. Additionally, therapy can provide valuable tools to process and manage these dreams.

At, you'll find a peer-to-peer community of individuals who understand what you've been through, as many of them have experienced similar traumas themselves. Sharing your experiences and connecting with others who can offer support and understanding can be incredibly beneficial. I encourage you to explore the different forums on, where you'll find specific sections for discussing topics related to PTSD and CPTSD.

Remember, you don't have to face this journey alone. Seeking professional help, connecting with others who understand, and prioritizing your own healing can all contribute to your recovery. Take care of yourself, and know that support is available to you.
Welcome to the forum!

It’s an amazing achievement to have reported your abuser. Irrespective of what the justice system does with that report, being able to take that step for your own healing is huge.

I ultimately did the same thing. And like you, I went through a period where I had an itch to let people know who he really was, for their own safety, and the safety of their loved ones.

I didn’t, because I know that however that plays out in my head, isn’t going to reflect what would happen in reality. And it simply became one of those things that I had to let go of, in order to be compassionate to myself.

Hope this forum is a helpful resource for your recovery:)
You are so brave. Reporting him means he is now in the sights of law enforcement.

As for confronting them, they are not likely to have the answers you want. Abusers tend to victim blame way more then society. For your own mental health let the police and the courts handle the legalities and focus on you right now. Seek a counselor who you feel comfortable with and seek the answers you want from them. The greatest advice my counselor gave me was simple, "they don't think like us". This has gotten me through all that obsessive thoughts of why and do they have remorse. Just the thought they don't think like us, makes it so much easier to stop looking for answers from someone whose mind is warped to begin with.