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I think promotes the same casual attitude to sex as my abuser, the only difference to me is that it’s consensual. I don’t think casual sex between two broken people is helpful to people with CPTSD.
I would caution you against this degree of distortion, since it is a result of your trauma and does not reflect reality for every person. Who defines "broken"? Why is consensual casual sex being put in the same category as abuse?
How come no-one picked up on the original distortion concerning how much easier it is to have a f*buddy than someone you care about. I can only cite myself and not make broad statements like that. If we’re in this forum we’re probably all open to distortion and if you go back to the OP opening question, he’s obviously in a great deal of pain and confusion and it’s belittling to him to devalue his pain to a f*buddy distortion. I’m in Australia and we’re a bit tired in this country of having the typical American casual attitude to sex shoved down our throats (no pun intended). Sex is too f*cking important to people with CPTSD and a history of CSA to whittle it down to f*ckbuddies. Sorry but I’m triggered now!
I'm speaking to you, not the OP, because you were the one making sweeping generalizations and putting casual sex on the same level as abuse or rape.
Your personal opinions about it aren't relevant - you're free to prefer meaningful relationships, as is your right. The OP is speaking about his personal feelings on a singular relationship, but your comments are broad and vague.
Not everyone who engages in casual sex is broken or unhealthy or abusive. That is a distortion.
And again this is a broad generalization. For some people sex has no inherent meaning beyond physical companionship, and that should not affect you in any way provided they aren't actually coercing you into sex - which obviously would cross a line into abuse.
I'll conclude this discussion nevertheless as this isn't conducive to the OP or the thread, and we will undoubtedly be asked to stop. But if you'd like to continue speaking with me on the matter you're free to comment in my diary or make another thread about it (it may be a great topic, in fact, as I am certain you aren't the only person here with these concerns).
In my case ‘broken’ was defined by a highly qualified psychiatrist. If you read my posts carefully you will see ‘I think’ and ‘in my case’. I’m careful to leave it open to a variety of responses and these are ‘my opinions’; it’s insulting to call them distortions.
I’ll throw it back to you, what makes you think that giving consent is exempt from abuse. Consent is a huge topic at the moment and it is as much open to abuse as any other human interaction.
Consent is somewhat irrelevant, as abuse can occur in both consensual and non-consensual relationships. But that's the point: something being casual is not inherently abusive unless abuse occurs. Casual sex isn't abusive on its own.
Consent is somewhat irrelevant, as abuse can occur in both consensual and non-consensual relationships. But that's the point: something being casual is not inherently abusive unless abuse occurs. Casual sex isn't abusive on its own.
Dear Weenie, I really don’t give a flying f*ck about your medical dictionary definitions. I was responding to the OP and you should learn to mind your own business.
I can look up mental illness terminology too. Your comments are not appropriate or appreciated. I didn’t join myPTSD to be triggered by someone who is as convincingly literate as my abuser was when I was 8 years old. He in fact showed me A Dictionary of Sex to validate his abuse which is what it feels like you are doing to me now. YOU NEED TO GET OFF MY CASE AND LEAVE ME ALONE.
