I'm new here, hi.
I'm currently dating a 23-year-old Korean college student (I'm 21) and I'm confused a bit as to whether this is a good relationship or not for me. We've been dating since May 2016 (so around five-six months) but there hasn't been any real change despite me trying to have multiple conversations with him.
Pros:
-He's kind, gentle, sweet, and he makes me laugh sometimes. He brings me flowers just because.
-He understands my PTSD and he is willing to stay with me despite me having troubles
-He's incredibly responsible and very smart, he's going to become a doctor.
-He's a nice guy, and we have fun on most of our dates.
-He's a gentleman, like he holds the door open every time.
-We have fun together, I like being around him
Cons:
-He still lives at home with his parents (NBD, his family is Korean and they hold traditional values) and he says that he's going to try to move out in a year or so.
-He won't come over when there's an emergency or where there are times that I could've used his support. I gathered up the courage to tell him about a particular abusive event and he had to leave, he kept saying that he didn't want to (and ended up talking to him for 15 mins in the front door) before he had to go home. He's got a strict curfew apparently despite being 23 years old. He will only see me on Friday evenings and on Thursday at noon for an hour.
-Every time, every time we see each other, we have sex. I never initiate it - he does. And the entire time I think to myself 'just finish already' I don't take any joy in it anymore.
-I don't feel like a priority in his life because he won't take the time out of his day to see me or come to do special events. Like our sorority formal was on a Saturday and I really wanted to go (he knew this) but the bus to formal left like ten mins after he got off of work, but he knew about it three weeks before, he could've put in a request to work earlier or take the day off or something. He won't even come out to have one drink for Halloween, he told me specifically that he won't ever go out on weekdays.
-I haven't met his family, and every time I try to bring it up he changes the subject. Probably won't ever get to meet them. I did meet his childhood friend Nicole, who he has no problem having a drink with and then driving after. (He won't ever drink when we go out)
Basically, I feel like shit whenever I'm not with him. When I'm with him, I feel okay/in love again, but for the past few weeks I've been uncomfortable with him, or the idea of being with him. I've planned the majority of our dates, and it feels like he just doesn't care anymore and now he's "settled down". Idk, my friends see their boyfriends every day of the week, and it just doesn't feel fair and it feels like I put in a lot more effort that he does. Am I just being bitchy about a real-life relationship or should I move on?
I'm currently dating a 23-year-old Korean college student (I'm 21) and I'm confused a bit as to whether this is a good relationship or not for me. We've been dating since May 2016 (so around five-six months) but there hasn't been any real change despite me trying to have multiple conversations with him.
Pros:
-He's kind, gentle, sweet, and he makes me laugh sometimes. He brings me flowers just because.
-He understands my PTSD and he is willing to stay with me despite me having troubles
-He's incredibly responsible and very smart, he's going to become a doctor.
-He's a nice guy, and we have fun on most of our dates.
-He's a gentleman, like he holds the door open every time.
-We have fun together, I like being around him
Cons:
-He still lives at home with his parents (NBD, his family is Korean and they hold traditional values) and he says that he's going to try to move out in a year or so.
-He won't come over when there's an emergency or where there are times that I could've used his support. I gathered up the courage to tell him about a particular abusive event and he had to leave, he kept saying that he didn't want to (and ended up talking to him for 15 mins in the front door) before he had to go home. He's got a strict curfew apparently despite being 23 years old. He will only see me on Friday evenings and on Thursday at noon for an hour.
-Every time, every time we see each other, we have sex. I never initiate it - he does. And the entire time I think to myself 'just finish already' I don't take any joy in it anymore.
-I don't feel like a priority in his life because he won't take the time out of his day to see me or come to do special events. Like our sorority formal was on a Saturday and I really wanted to go (he knew this) but the bus to formal left like ten mins after he got off of work, but he knew about it three weeks before, he could've put in a request to work earlier or take the day off or something. He won't even come out to have one drink for Halloween, he told me specifically that he won't ever go out on weekdays.
-I haven't met his family, and every time I try to bring it up he changes the subject. Probably won't ever get to meet them. I did meet his childhood friend Nicole, who he has no problem having a drink with and then driving after. (He won't ever drink when we go out)
Basically, I feel like shit whenever I'm not with him. When I'm with him, I feel okay/in love again, but for the past few weeks I've been uncomfortable with him, or the idea of being with him. I've planned the majority of our dates, and it feels like he just doesn't care anymore and now he's "settled down". Idk, my friends see their boyfriends every day of the week, and it just doesn't feel fair and it feels like I put in a lot more effort that he does. Am I just being bitchy about a real-life relationship or should I move on?
