Significant Other Doesn't Know...

[superman1496]

So, my significant other doesn't know that I have PTSD. She knows what has happened to me, to a certain extent, and knows that it has caused some issues, but she doesn't know bad it is. She doesn't know about the panic attacks, the nightmares, etc. I know that she is understanding, but I'm scared that if I start opening up it's just going to stress everything out. She is very bad with stress, and has more then enough right now going on without my problems.

I'm scared that it will cause more issues than I can handle, but is keeping her in the dark better?

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[Beverly G.]

No. If she can not handle the truth she is not the right person for you. Besides how do you think she will feel when your relationship gets even more serious and then she finds out you were keeping something that important from her.

 

[evergreen]

Honesty is important in relationships. Don't build one on dishonesty. Withholding the truth is dishonest.

Good luck, you can do it!

 

[superman1496]

I don't want her thinking I'm crazy. More importantly, I don't want her thinking I am unfit to take care of my daughter. To be honest, I'm terrified of the ramifactions of telling her.

 

[Nicolette]

Please, as a Supporter, I beg you to tell her...... just read the home page and I need to say no more.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a life threatening, debilitating disorder that can break down a sufferer’s body through anxiety and stress. Further it poses a significant suicide risk resulting from the brains neurological imbalance and chemical depression.

PTSD is serious and to me not telling her is not fair nor can she begin to equip herself to deal with anything sudden if she has no idea or concept.

Again, I beg you to tell her and after knowing what I know about it I would consider you keeping it a secret on the same level as a betrayal. JMHO.

 

[evergreen]

I can understand your fears. Makes complete sense to me.

But, it is possible she won't think that. Hiding ourselves from someone we are intimate with is very harmful. It is a message to ourselves from ourselves that we are unworthy. Telling ourselves we are unworthy wil lead to self sabotaging behaviors.

Finding a therapist may help you figure out the best way to go about doing it. Maybe you are afraid of going to one--I have been for a long time--but I just found one that takes Medicaid (government insurance) and I am going to go. Many people here have told me they were afraid of going to therapy, but found a lot of help once they did.

Most importantly though--you have to know you are worthy, and that you can heal, and that you deserve to love and be loved.

 

[superman1496]

Ok, you win. I don't know how I will, but I will talk to her about it. Not going to lie though, even just writing this is making me extremely nervous. It's probably a good thing that I got a couple women to read and respond to this. Especially you Nicolette. Ugh. Wish me luck.

 

[evergreen]

Good luck :)

 

[Nicolette]

You have my support Superman. Why not post a question down in the [DLMURL="https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/forums/supporter-relationships.44/"]Supporters Relationship[/DLMURL] section asking them on ideas as they are predominately women.

 

[superman1496]

I will do that. Thank you guys (girls) for the help. If I didn't know any better, I would think I was on some supportive forum type thing. ;)

 

[amethist]

You have found one of the best support forums on the web superman. For both sufferers and supporters. :tup:

 

[superman1496]

I picked the most in-oppurtune time to talk about it, but we have agreed that we can talk about it more in depth at a later time (hopefully tomorrow, I'm not very patient). She seems to be just fine with it. I think she is just happy that I have found some support outside of her. It's the one thing that I've needed most (support) that I haven't been able to really find. Of course she does what she can, but I find it hard to go to her with all the stress we both have already. Which, again, is why her and I are both glad I found this website. Thank you again.