Okay, perhaps forever is a bit dramatic.
Backstory, since this is my first time using one of these forums.
I grew privileged, but with a physically and psychologically abusive mother and a mentally ill mother. I married and cut ties with them in 2011. Shortly thereafter, my mother-in-law went on an abusive alcohol and prescription bender and assaulted me. My husband and I were sharing a residence with her and had decided to cut ties and move across town. She harassed our employers, our landlords, broke into our car, and left vicious notes taped to our door. We contacted the police, who didn't want to help. We finally decided that for the sake of our mental health and safety, we needed to leave the state.
We told our employers and landlords that we were leaving, but just said "North Carolina", nothing specific. We didn't want to be tracked. We settled in to North Carolina, I started at a serving job that paid well and was in a sketchy place. Three weeks after we settled in, I had discovered that my previous abusers found my new address. That night I was violently raped by a stranger outside of my apartment. I reported it as a mugging to the police, and because of the way I was treated, I didn't bother to follow up with the words "I was raped." I kept it a secret from everyone for the longest time, only telling my husband three weeks later.
In the three-and-a-half years after my rape, my PTSD has been well-managed for the most part. Until last Wednesday. My sister-in-law was "mugged" by a random assailant outside of her apartment, over 1,000 miles away. Finding out about this, and the similarities between our cases (the description of the attacker, the knife that was used, etc.) has brought back all my troubles. I can't eat well, I am angry, I am losing time and memories, and I can't sleep. I just want to lay back on the couch, hug a pillow, and make everything go away all day, every day. My husband wants to support me, but he just doesn't know what to do.
Currently I am on 20 mg of fluoxetine and am using diphenhydramine to try to get some sleep (I was previously prescribed Ativan as well, but that had some adverse side effects). I've tried warm baths, meditation, exercise, cutting out coffee, etc. and I still am not feeling better.
Any advice? Because I don't know how much longer I can take this.
Backstory, since this is my first time using one of these forums.
I grew privileged, but with a physically and psychologically abusive mother and a mentally ill mother. I married and cut ties with them in 2011. Shortly thereafter, my mother-in-law went on an abusive alcohol and prescription bender and assaulted me. My husband and I were sharing a residence with her and had decided to cut ties and move across town. She harassed our employers, our landlords, broke into our car, and left vicious notes taped to our door. We contacted the police, who didn't want to help. We finally decided that for the sake of our mental health and safety, we needed to leave the state.
We told our employers and landlords that we were leaving, but just said "North Carolina", nothing specific. We didn't want to be tracked. We settled in to North Carolina, I started at a serving job that paid well and was in a sketchy place. Three weeks after we settled in, I had discovered that my previous abusers found my new address. That night I was violently raped by a stranger outside of my apartment. I reported it as a mugging to the police, and because of the way I was treated, I didn't bother to follow up with the words "I was raped." I kept it a secret from everyone for the longest time, only telling my husband three weeks later.
In the three-and-a-half years after my rape, my PTSD has been well-managed for the most part. Until last Wednesday. My sister-in-law was "mugged" by a random assailant outside of her apartment, over 1,000 miles away. Finding out about this, and the similarities between our cases (the description of the attacker, the knife that was used, etc.) has brought back all my troubles. I can't eat well, I am angry, I am losing time and memories, and I can't sleep. I just want to lay back on the couch, hug a pillow, and make everything go away all day, every day. My husband wants to support me, but he just doesn't know what to do.
Currently I am on 20 mg of fluoxetine and am using diphenhydramine to try to get some sleep (I was previously prescribed Ativan as well, but that had some adverse side effects). I've tried warm baths, meditation, exercise, cutting out coffee, etc. and I still am not feeling better.
Any advice? Because I don't know how much longer I can take this.
Last edited by a moderator:
