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So Far Down (May Be Triggering s**c*d*)

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Cookie, the doctors will often tell you they know what they are doing, but the facts are, doctors do not know what drug is best for you, because every person is unique, and each time they prescribe, IT IS a matter of trial and error to get the right drugs to the individual person. It rarely works out positive the first time.

One problem you have, is two doctors issueing drugs. Never a good thing. The next is that you have doctors who think that issueing you more drugs to counter act the side effects of one drug, is a positive step forward. Wrong... You have PTSD Cookie... and now there are newer drugs that achieve both anxiety and depression, ie. lexapro does both, and a few others that are now available. Chances are, your doctors don't give a shit, because they get paid by merely prescribing you more drugs.

Break the cycle cookie, and get control of yourself and what you are putting into your body. The doctors don't sound like they give a crap, so I would start researching your drugs, read about the side effects, interactions between other drugs, and know everything there is to know about them, then go in to your doctor armed with knowledge, tell them to stick it in their arse, and start having some compassion and give a shit about what they are giving you.
anthony, you sound angry.. i am sorry if i have upset you, never my intention. i only have l dr. issuing drugs now, my family dr. insisted that i go to a psychiatrist, and he took over everything. I have looked up the drugs on the internet and looked for interactions and so forth, but that's my only resource. i just yesterday was able to share a lot of my "symptoms" with my t, and she said she wants to call him, since i don't think i can tell him all that. and she wants to talk to him about my meds. so i feel like she is trying to watch out for me somewhat. besides being a clinical specialist with a phd, she has been in psychiatric nursing for a long time, so i feel a lot of confidence with her, and she is much more "proactive" than others i've had that just want me to talk. Please forgive me if i have offended you, i don't always think before i "speak" (or type, evidently) cookie
Cookie, you have not made me angry, or offended me... sorry if it came across that way, as I am not even remotely offended about anything here generally. Doctors do piss me off with their blase attitude they apply across their patients, with little caring or understanding for each patient as an individual. Doctors often make me angry, because they have alterior motives behind prescribing medications, and that is wrong.

That is very positive to hear actually cookie, in that you have such an experienced therapist. That is the aim, as they often know more than the doctors do nowadays. See, you do have symptoms from the drugs, where before you denied so, if I remember correctly. I didn't realise some of my symptoms when using them until I had researched them, and read the entire pages of side effects, at which point tossed me a bit, that pages of side effects for one drug existed. Shocked!!!

Your therapist will hopefully get you off all these drugs now, and down to just the one, ie. lexapro for the time being, as that atleast covers both angles, however; lexapro gave me serious suicidal tendancies. It worked for everything else, and I just had to fight the suicidal thoughts constantly, but it gave me breatheing space. When I got of lexapro, suddenly no more suicidal thoughts anymore... amazing ha? Not really, that is medication and what it does. My doctors wanted to give me more medications to counter side effects, at which point I told them NO... I will sort it out myself.
hey! just wanted to let wildfire and anthony know that my husband came home and went immediately to buy a gun safe. they are all locked up now. i am feeling better for now. wish i could say forever. i didn't know how badly i missed my t, i have more hope now that she has opened her office, and i can go back to her. cookie

First things first. Don't worry about upsetting my husband, like he said he is not angry at you......its the meds thing. It bends him out of shape everytime, mainly because a lot of therapists, doctors (etc) aren't always motivated by what is in the best interests of the patient/client. Take my word for it, he's got tough skin and straight to the point is just his approach.

Secondly, that cocktail of meds is concerning. I am with everyone else, please speak with the therapist you trust and get that sorted. It surely can't be good for you, I don't care what the doctors say, that's just too much mixing with medication.

Third. Although your husband has a gun cabinet does he really need them in the house anyway? Do you have access or could you gain access? I like weapons myself and plenty of times have mentioned that I would like to have a pistol in the house but Anthony won't agree. I don't know his motivation for that but have agreed to go with his wishes. By our gun laws we have to store a licensed weapon (and there are limits on those) in a different lockable cabinet to the ammunition. If you have or have previously had suicide ideation it is not a good idea to keep anything around that would easily help you take your own life.

Hope this finds you feeling a little better. Please take care.
cookie said:
hey! just wanted to let wildfire and anthony know that my husband came home and went immediately to buy a gun safe. they are all locked up now. i am feeling better for now. wish i could say forever. i didn't know how badly i missed my t, i have more hope now that she has opened her office, and i can go back to her. cookie

That is some very great news cookie. A safe is better than nothing. My personnel recommendation would be to leave to them at a gun club or the like, but a safe is better than having them available to yourself. Having your therapist available for you again is excellent. I hope you have appointments booked up already.

Remember cookie... there is a better side to life, and what your within now does get better if you want it too.
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