Two of my flashbacks tonight were triggered by songs.
"Tequila Sunrise" was playing in the next room when I was sexually assaulted in college, and I can't ever hear it without remembering that night, but this was a strong, miserably vivid flashback, with body memories and everything.
Then later I heard Rob Gils' cover of The Who's "Behind Blue Eyes." I never really listened to the lyrics before, and I have no idea whether they wrote this about a child molester, but it sure spun that way for me. My childhood assailant had vivid blue eyes, and was so cold, with no conscience at all. Does anyone else see it in these lyrics?
Behind Blue Eyes
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
No one knows what it's like
To be hated
To be fated
To telling only lies
But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through
But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
When my fist clenches, crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile, tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool
And If I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
And If I shiver, please give me a blanket
Keep me warm, let me wear your coat
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
