LizardViolet
Silver Member
In the past few days, my bf said some things he's never, ever said before. I am really happy about this.
Last Thursday, during an exchange that was pretty typical (he was teasing me about me being "evil," which to him is a joke), he used the word THERAPY. He was saying what he'd need to handle someone as evil and soul-sucking as me. He has never used the word in a positive context pretty much as long as I've known him, which is more than five years.
I was with him last night. He'd had a bad day. He is on a remodeling job and the wife of the couple who own the house has been critical of him, which he reacts badly to. He's told her a couple of times that he could just quit. I've said a few times before, and I said last night, that when people are unkind, it's usually about what's going on with them, not about him. His typical response has been to affirm that people are hurting him on purpose. This time, he didn't say that. He said, it still hurts me.
The last thing, also last night, was when we were talking about how tired and worn out he has been feeling lately. I think that his muscles are so sore because his liver is not working at capacity, due to many years of alcohol abuse. I asked him if he had any theories about how he's feeling. He said that he chooses people to date who abuse him, because that's what he's used to. That was a completely new thought coming from him!
I am very excited about this level of introspection. I have seen little positive signs over the years, but these things were on a whole new level.
Last Thursday, during an exchange that was pretty typical (he was teasing me about me being "evil," which to him is a joke), he used the word THERAPY. He was saying what he'd need to handle someone as evil and soul-sucking as me. He has never used the word in a positive context pretty much as long as I've known him, which is more than five years.
I was with him last night. He'd had a bad day. He is on a remodeling job and the wife of the couple who own the house has been critical of him, which he reacts badly to. He's told her a couple of times that he could just quit. I've said a few times before, and I said last night, that when people are unkind, it's usually about what's going on with them, not about him. His typical response has been to affirm that people are hurting him on purpose. This time, he didn't say that. He said, it still hurts me.
The last thing, also last night, was when we were talking about how tired and worn out he has been feeling lately. I think that his muscles are so sore because his liver is not working at capacity, due to many years of alcohol abuse. I asked him if he had any theories about how he's feeling. He said that he chooses people to date who abuse him, because that's what he's used to. That was a completely new thought coming from him!
I am very excited about this level of introspection. I have seen little positive signs over the years, but these things were on a whole new level.
