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Sufferer Sufferer... I Prefer Survivor!

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Survivor41

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Howdy y'all,
I stumbled upon this looking to Google to answer some questions, as I tend to do in areas involving my PTSD. I don't like to talk about any of my dilemmas with my friends, as I don't expect them to understand how things work for me, plus, I don't want to be the Debbie-Downer. Hopefully I will find the answers or input I'm looking for here.
I got my PTSD from being raped and denied it until it was put on paper just this past May, as I got in a one-vehicle accident due to having a flashback while driving. I thought I was dead as my car rolled and flipped a total of seven times with my head out the window getting crushed under the car. I reckon this won't help my case in the long run, but it sure helped me realize how much control I had let my past have over me.
I've decided to take control back after miscarrying while going through a rough spell dealing with my shadow, and more importantly, after my near-death experience. I wouldn't recommend my path to recovery to everyone, but I don't get flashbacks anymore during sex due to having a very good friend who also happens to be a friend with benefits that has taken the patience to hear me out and work with me through it. I trust him, and now I can enjoy sex without memories getting in the way. I don't beat myself up and degrade myself anymore because I decided to take control and become a part of something bigger- the Army.
I've lost a close, serious relationship due to PTSD and have been too distant and afraid to try again. Fear of judgement, numbness, and anxiety are things I still battle with but hope to overcome. I was a kid that grew up in a household haunted and dictated by PTSD, and I refuse to let it haunt me or anyone I'm close to to the point of controlling anymore.
 
Howdy y'all,
I stumbled upon this looking to Google to answer some questions, as I tend to do in ar...
I admire you for being strong enough to stand up to your PTSD and fight back. I know how hard it is. I'm envious and proud of you for this. I want the same thing in my life! Keep being my hero okay?
 
I admire you for being strong enough to stand up to your PTSD and fight back. I know how hard it is. I...
Oh, it only cost me half an ear, my job, a TBI and reminding back pain for me to finally get the balls to stand up for myself! I guess I'm just the kind of person that requires a swift kick in the buttocks to get my head out of it!
 
I admire you for being strong enough to stand up to your PTSD and fight back. I know how hard it is. I...
Also, I have a hero in my own life that has been my thunder buddy, guardian angel, and purpose: my rescue pitbull. The breed really does get a bad rap, and they are such sweet cuddle bugs with a sense of humor. I don't know if I'd still be here if it wasn't for her. When she was dumped into my life, I didn't want a dog and really felt that I couldn't take care of her if I had a hard enough time taking care of myself. But the truth of the matter is she takes care of me.
 
Oh, it only cost me half an ear, my job, a TBI and reminding back pain for me to finally get the ball...
Yeah? Well if I lost my job I don't think id be able to come back from that. An ear, well that's just a flesh wound.....hahahahahha. What is TBI? I've had a lot of success and luck in my life besides the bad things that have happened. I've been knocked down to ground zero a few times, but always seemed to keep my job and fight through it. I think I'm out of lives at this point though. I think as you get older, and after a few times escaping death, it takes a toll on you, larges pieces out of you, and maybe you don't get those pieces back.
 
Yeah? Well if I lost my job I don't think id be able to come back from that. An ear, well that's just...
A TBI is a traumatic brain injury. I was a waitress and treated this like a regular concussion and went back to work as soon as I could stay awake for a 6-hr period... I had vertigo still and wound up being the biggest klutz ever! I'm not one to take time to recuperate; I get back up on the horse and ride that SOB... but sometimes it's better to take the necessary time to heal first- less spilled coffee.
 
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