Suggestions For Student With Ptsd

[Eleanor]

Wow, Girl3, thank you for that info. I had no idea, and of course it makes perfect sense so I feel dumb for not having thought it might work that way.:whistling: Good to know. My H always goes for activity, and this may be why....

Hang in there Beth - keep taking care of yourself. Better days ahead! Peace and healing to you.

 

[MyStarryNight]

Girl3, thanks for mentioning that about the breathing, I've been having a hard time with slow breathing. Now that I think about it, it completely makes sense why I freak out. I think my brain views relaxation as a threat.

Thanks all for your study tips. I'm in school now and am surving. It's not easy but I think I'm going to make it :)

 

[EloiseLandau]

My own school has been a series of starts and stops. Take classes, fail some, pass some. Take medical leave. Come back. Go to part time. Finally establish a supportive network... after 17 years of casting around and trying so hard, I'm finally going to graduate this May with a BS in Biology. I'm looking at grad school too.
I just know it's possible. Start, stop, go back, take a break... it can be done. Probably faster and better than how I did it.

And I refuse to believe I am so unique that other people can't do it, too.

 

[HëllaBubz]

I'm in my second year at university, I burned out the first year, thinking I could go back to my old flat out self.......yeah, didn't work so great! I started this semester with 3 subjects, dropped down to 2, now about to become either 1 or none.....I find that if I can't meet deadlines this semester, I just continue to attend the class til the end of semester, then get graded as withdrawn, and I try again next semester.

It actually really really helps the material soak in, and although it frustrates my partner and everyone around me to no end, I kind of feel better knowing that I'm not a failure, and that I do have my own time lines that I have to work around, screw everyone else. It also feels good knowing that even if I try really really hard this semester, and don't make it for the assignment and exam, at least I know I've learned a bit more, and I can keep going next semester.

I refuse to sit at home and stagnate permanently, but at the same time, I now know that I can rest and heal when I need to without feeling guilty all the time.

 

[PTSD sufferer]

I found that when concentration on reading was hard, I would find it easier if I asked someone else to read a couple of pages to me. This is a good option as it takes stress out of it and there are dialectical studies that show listening to be a more natural learning technique (its how we learn as babies) and you have to coordinate less of your senses so you can retain information more easily. It also helps as you can discuss it with the person reading to you.

I also write notes on large strips of paper and hang them in the wall (and I mean large writing). I use this to cover the key formulas, theories etc. These go great in the bedroom, as while you fall asleep or when you just wake up you are subconsciously exposing yourself to the key information needed just by looking at it. If you have a visual memory (not in a PTSD sense) then this is very helpful.

I think pacing yourself is also helpful. The beauty of studying online is that you can take timeout when you need it. Plan ahead though, so go through every assessment you need to do and give yourself a head start so that when you need a break, you can take the break knowing that you have done some work and progressed.

Disassociation has to do with stress and triggers, so take it one day at a time. Don't put too much pressure on yourself and keep batting away the negative self talk. Mindfulness is a great tool, let the disassociation wash over you, and don't get upset that you disassociated. I spend a lot of time talking to my brain, when I have flashbacks etc, I actually say out loud to my brain 'thank you for telling me that brain, I know that now and I get it'. Then I move on to other things until it happens again and I say the same thing.

When it comes to exam time, you can speak to the college counsellor about what they can do for people with disabilities in exam situations. This can sometimes include giving you 'actual breaks' throughout the exams, and/ or having a longer time to complete the exam. These sorts of services are there to help you. Always know that your GP can write a letter for you to the college requesting an extension on assignments too when you are feeling really unwell, so there are services available that can make college a little bit easier.

BTW congrats on doing college, what a wonderful achievement!

I am about to graduate with a Master's myself, so it can be done in your own time. It wasn't easy, it got easier with time, I had my ups and downs and sideways moments, but it can be done in your own time.

There are no such things as failures, just opportunities to try something different :)

 

[Girl3]

We all learn differently and at different rates. Remember - when it was before most people could read or write - then all people learned by listening and/or demonstration. Kinetic learning - by doing, trial, physical imprinting - those things have gone by the wayside because of the printing press...

Leonardo da Vinci and Michaelangelo didn't become brilliant artists by reading about art - what we cannot read or learn by reading we may learn better by doing or watching. And if we are kinetic learners - then we need to place ourselves in positions to learn that way.

 

[HëllaBubz]

Well, I'll try to explain in a shorter version, but one of the reasons I'm having trouble in one of my classes is because of another girl who used to be my study buddy.

I had a professor who was into horses, and we chatted a fair bit before and after class because I used to work in racing stables.

He started getting really familiar with me, and when I asked for help and then sat down at the desk, he came up behind me, and clapped his hands on my shoulders and leaned over my shoulder to ask me what the problem was.

Now I'm sure you can all appreciate how this affects PTSD sufferers, but the worst part is that he did it several other times, in varying ways, and it completely traumatized me, but the worst incident was when I saw something on ninemsn that surprised me, so I said something to the effect of 'well bugger me!', and the next thing I know, he comes up behind me and says in my ear, 'well I'd like to.'

I ended up reporting it, and my friend who was my study buddy was also there for the incidents, so she put in a statement also, and they took it seriously. I ended up meeting with the teacher again, and I am not someone to hold a grudge, so I told him I wasn't out for blood, and that I just wanted recognition and help.

Now, for a long time, I would dedicate my entire weekends to studying with my buddy, and teaching her the stuff she didn't understand.....she's not the brightest of people, but I'm also fairly intelligent.
I got an sms from my childhood friend's wife, apparently he had been hitting her and she had left the house, she had no where to go and I was her only friend.

So, having a history in gang rape, violence and assault myself, I immediately rushed to pick her up, and dropped my study for the weekend.

So my study buddy turns around to me and tells me that I obviously don't have my priorities straight, and that if it was her, she would choose study, other people's problems shouldn't be my concern!

I was absolutely furious, but said nothing, just apologized for the interruption to the study, and promised I would help her later in the week before our next class.

Anyway, as you might appreciate, the details of the discussions with the uni and the offending teacher are confidential, especially when other students know who the teacher is, so when my study buddy who had put in statements wanted to know what had happened, I told her that I had agreed to keep it confidential, and so I couldn't say anything.

Well, this pissed them off, and the next thing I know I'm copping a huge serve for not being a friend, and they 'deserved' to know what happened because they put in statements...... needless to say, I didn't budge!

I started getting harassed by text, nasty comments were thrown in class, publicly snubbed me, and the other students whom I was tutoring in ESL, suddenly, inexplicably, vanished!

So this semester, I walk into my new class and see her sitting there. I say nothing, I just sit down, and soon enough, I've made a new friend. Only problem being that she was eavesdropping on my conversation with my new friend, and making snide remarks that the entire class could hear.

I ignored her, but when my friend wanted to know why I knew so much about the subject, I told him that I had been ill (technically true :)) and that I had been forced to drop all my subjects from last semester to re cooperate.

Next thing I know, I hear a bark of laughter, and hear her exclaim loudly, 'did you hear that, the stupid bitch had to drop everything!'.

Needless to say, I've only been back to class twice since then....but the thought of having to go back to class fills me with terror, and I really really don't want to have to face her again, studying and concentrating is hard enough, but she is just pure poison.

Anyway.....that's my rant for today :confused:

 

[PTSD sufferer]

I love how you think Girl 3! Admiration of your wisdom and intelligence coming your way!

Hi Bubzilla,

That girl does sound like a nasty little child! I think the best we can do is to rise above what your ex-friend is saying, because a true friend would have understood that you are a good, kind and giving person. There is good reason to allot 'ex-friend' status to that girl!

It can be hard to face these types of people, because this person is school yard bullying using words and gossip. One day, that person will realise that the gossip will bite them in the back side. As, these people only ever have superficial friendships, because of the nasty tongue they have.

If she has a go at you in public again, I would probably say something back to her along the lines of .... 'we used to be friends a long time ago, and your friends will one day realise that, through no fault of their own, their friendship is destined to end up the way you are treating me right now'.

It might make a few of them think about whether they want her as a friend!

You don't need to explain yourself, or tell your friends everything. Gossip is not friendship, truly valuing another person for who they are, is what I believe real friendship to be.

It sounds like that teacher should never have been in such a position (grr) - sexual harassment is inexcusable! Yes, very traumatising indeed!

Not all teachers are like this though, so I hope that is some comfort. If you ever feel uncomfortable, then you can remove yourself from the situation and your new friend could be a good source of distraction.

It might help to write a list of options you can take if you feel uncomfortable and some familiar places that you can go to and feel safe. I picked a patch of grass in the middle of a park for sunny days with good visibility features, and a bench in a high traffic area for rainy days so I could watch people walking past while I had the comfort of my back against the wall, and a coffee shop (where one table pretty much has my name on it) - I give myself permission to go to these places any time.

You are a survivor, and a kind and giving person. Those that matter will know this about you. Those that don't matter can get stuffed.

The scariest thing is getting through the door the first time, take your time and keep trying. Be kind and patient with yourself and talk yourself through it - one step at a time. Achieving this is another step in the right direction on your journey.

 

[HëllaBubz]

Aww, you made my day hun:tup:

Wish there was a hug emoticon!

Unfortunately I study at night, in an area of my city that is notoriously unsafe both at day and night, but I have some pretty good teachers who have been pretty supportive, so I'm grateful for that.

As for this other girl, well I have chosen to avoid her, and let her fade into history. She has done several subjects that I have yet to do, so I doubt I will run into her again after this semester.

The chef at the campus cafe knows me kinda well now, so if I want a cheery face I go and talk to him for a minute or two, and I always leave smiling, besides, I like people to remember me smiling, even if it is something tiny that they don't even realize, because I wouldn't have that smile unless I'd spoken to them in the first place!

I really enjoy being kind to other people, there is always the temptation to say something negative, but I enjoy the feeling I get when I know I've helped someone out, regardless of whether or not they are outwardly grateful.

I guess its also my biological clock ticking, its really kicking me in the ass, I desperately want children, but I know I can't in my current state.....so bloody frustrating! I'm very much a mothering, cuddly type of person, although I can turn into a fiend occasionally.....my nickname is a mush of Bubbles and Godzilla......you work it out!!!

 

[Dethuan]

Usually I just try to keep track of time. So far I've been unsuccessful. This page has given me a few ideas, thanx.

 

[Red Feather]

I am pretty sure that the only reason why I was able to finish school with a Diploma (equivalent to Masters) was because I was studying art and had very little theory to manage. When I did have to write papers and read, I had an enormous amount of difficulties. I think it took me 3 years to write one paper. But in the end I finished and finished among the top of my year. I often wanted to give up during those 5 years, but I kept at it. It was worth not giving up. :tup:

 

[Girl3]

Bubzilla, I've had to work with mean surgeons over the years. I've learned that nothing gets meanies down more than being condescendingly nice to them. Playing innocent to their remarks - "Yes I really did have to drop everything, I was that ill. But I can't imagine why dear Sally you'd call me that. At any rate, it took me a while to recover, but I feel GREAT now." Then smile really big at her.