The stigma of mental illness

[scout86]

It must be fear. Humans are good at fear.

I'm pretty sure that's a big part of where it comes from. That and lack of real exposure to a different version of reality.

On a positive note (in case it makes you feel any better).... A few years ago, one of my best friends shot himself. PTSD. He lived clear across the country. I couldn't make it to the funeral, but his family (my unofficially adopted family) needed some help, so I needed to get there ASAP. Which meant my truck needed some work. Took it to my mechanic, who's in the National Guard, explained the situation and begged for an unscheduled appointment. And got one. While we were waiting for the guys to get done with the truck, we were talking. He mentioned that he'd had a couple friends he'd served with commit suicide. He said he really couldn't understand it, it just didn't make sense to him. Well, as luck would have it, it makes sense to me. I normally don't talk about this stuff, but decided to go out on a limb and I told him I've got PTSD, for non-military reasons, "what would you like to know about suicide?" He really listened. I think he got it, as well as someone who's never been there actually can. At the end of the conversation, with tears in his eyes he said, "You take care of yourself! You're a good customer and I need all the good customers I can get. If you need anything CALL ME." I about had tears in my eyes too, because that is NOT the reaction I was expecting. Best mechanic in the world, I send business his way every chance I get. So, there actually are people out there who are decent.

You do what you can to give a more accurate picture, I guess. Sometimes that's keep your head down & shut up. Sometimes it's not.

 

[ladee]

And we have to teach our self, with the help of others, that we are the furthest thing in the world from "less than". Those that use that tone...for whatever excuse or reason, could not do the gut wrenching, insane, roller coaster we do in our healing work.

So let them use that tone hon. The 'shame' is on them for being judgemental about something they are ignorant about.

Makes me want to say to them...you couldn't for one day,do what I've done for years. So think what you will about mental illness. We are some of the strongest and committed people you will ever meet.

Sorry this has triggered you. It' a lesson. Learn what you need to learn from it. None of us are "less than".

 

[Scarlet13]

Yes, that"s a good thought about the strength it takes to have gone through shit when a huge part of the stigma is implied weakness.

 

[Multitudes]

He mentioned that he'd had a couple friends he'd served with commit suicide. He said he really couldn't understand it, it just didn't make sense to him. Well, as luck would have it, it makes sense to me. I normally don't talk about this stuff, but decided to go out on a limb and I told him I've got PTSD, for non-military reasons, "what would you like to know about suicide?"

I've come across this myself a few times and your story made me feel good that, sometimes, people really can get it.

I've long been an advocate for abolishing the stigma of mental health, attempting to enable some understanding of how common it is, how vulnerable anyone is to it and how surviving and managing it deserve respect, not denial and ostracism.

As a survivor of several suicide attempts I was called 'selfish' for thinking only of myself, being inconsiderate of the grief and suffering of those I would leave behind.
I tried to explain that depression is an illness, a cancer, that eats away at everything good until all that's left is hopelessness, the desire to end my pain and save those I care about from having to suffer me any longer. I wasn't thinking rationally, I was mentally ill and completely lost in that darkness.

The survivor I am is appalled at how close my illness came to ending me, but I've found it so hard to make others understand, to get past their judgement, their bias, their fear.

I will keep at it, for those who are open.

 

[Scarlet13]

Yes, and the denial and ostracism is felt too by people who have mental illness. The fear of being mentally ill is what fuels denial.
The acceptance of having been abused is what makes therapy so difficult.
I feel better now about what those women said.
But, I have been sort of telling them off in my mind since then.