Therapist Said Im Subtle

[Cleo6]

We were talking about my family and t said I was subtle towards family. I don't know how I feel about it. It hurts but I don't know if I'm over reacting. All my family like putting me down so I just let them as I know it gets worse if I say anything back and it's really hard when you hear people put you down all your life to actually stand up for myself

 

[MisterCatLady]

Do you consider it to be a bad thing to be subtle with your family? Really that just sounds like a benign observation. Did she go on to say that you shouldn't be subtle with your family? She could've been trying to validate your feelings of being put down by your family. Really there are endless scenarios.

 

[Freedomfighter]

We were talking about my family and t said I was subtle towards family. I don't know how I feel about it. It hurts but I...

Yeah, subtle is not a bad thing, especially if you are dealing with hurtful people. Is it suggested you should start screaming at them? Because that results in open violence more often than not which often involves the cops.

 

[Beaglefan61]

Your being subtle, i wonder if that is from fear of you standing up for yourself and possible retaliation or if it is from self-doubt and you not knowing very clearly what to do or how to react. As freedomfighter stated, subtle is not a bad thing. It may depend on how it is done. Retaliation can be subtle, as can be avoidance. So can be pulling back to find out what is best and finding it is some odd shade of grey that requires much discretion. Subtle can be okay. How would you prefer to be?