Therapy... How To Decide Enough Is Enough...

[Muted]

When is it time to say enough is enough in therapy?

I've invested time and money and thought I was getting better, but now I'm seeing I'm going downhill fast and it's having a rippling effect...

Is it time to call it quits? I don't feel like it's helping me anymore...

 

[FauxLiz]

@Gia1019 I understand how you feel sometimes I think that therapy is doing more harm than good. But I can't tell you if it is time to quit. I know that I and everyone here will support you what ever you decision you make. Maybe though rather than outright quitting maybe you speak to your T about taking a break for a while. That way you don't burn the bridge and can't return but you gain some breathing room to figure out what you want and if that includes therapy.

 

[woogawooga]

I changed therapists when I felt like I did all I could do with the one I was seeing for about 18 months. I learned a lot with that T but I outgrew her and needed to take things to the next level with someone new.

 

[ladee]

Of course not knowing your story..I can only share my experience.
It did feel like I was sliding backward...but the truth was the really hard stuff was surfacing. That's when I had to recommit to healing.
It does get worse before it gets better. Seems to be that with for many of us..
But the breakthrus were starting and the real healing was beginning.
My attitude was feel it now or feel it later. It was already exposed and wasn't going anywhere until I started dealing with it.
So I stuck with it. And started getting better.
Of course it's up to you.
The pain isn't going anywhere until We start to heal it.
I wish you the courage to continue...believe it or not...you really are worth the hard work.
It sucks..it hurts and nothing fair about it. That will never change..what changes is the pride we start to feel for doing the work and change starts to happen.
Learn ways to do self care along the way. It is invaluable to help us to the other side

Hope things get better for You...or at least different.
You are worth this work!

 

[ladee]

And what @woogawooga said is true also. Maybe you have gone as far ss you can with this T. Just try not to stop.

 

[Muted]

@Gia1019 I understand how you feel sometimes I think that therapy is doing more harm...

I have already started really shutting her out, I'm afraid if I take a break I won't ever go back.

 

[Muted]

I changed therapists when I felt like I did all I could do with the one I was seeing for about 18 mo...

Truly, I've gotten way farther with this one and don't really feel like I've outgrown her... I'm just not sure what it is exactly...

 

[Muted]

Thanks for the encouragement @ladee , I'm seeing what it's taking out of me and feel like between that and my job, it's costing my family a lot emotionally and I don't see it paying off anymore.

 

[ladee]

If you are already shutting her out..you may have gone as far as you van go with her. That's a good thing..possibly you are reluctant to be uncomfortable telling her you need to move on.
Just a thought.
Wishing you progress regardless of which road you take.

 

[Suzetig]

Take a break or stop - you can always go back if things change. PTSD doesn't mean you need to be in perpetual therapy - if you're doing ok stop and if you still have work to do you can start again. Trust me if you get to where you need support, you'll go back. It may be worthwhile to see how you get on using your other supports and coping strategies for a while.

Good luck :-)

 

[BurgersandFries]

Funny...I quit my T last week. I've been with him for over 5 years. I found that I was getting worse-my self-worth was suffering and I was experiencing various dissociative episodes throughout the day especially after my therapy sessions! It became unmanageable for me to function in my day-to-day life. I was seeing him twice a week and it would take 2-3 days to get over the session-the effects were deleterious: I became unemployed; I gained 60 lbs; I became so isolated I couldn't even tolerate going to church and, my spiritual life was non-existant because of his hostility towards God. (He would make jokes about God, ridiculing people who believed in Christ). I am completely isolated with no family or friends.

I was also going to a C-PTSD group therapy to learn skills for coping (excellent course)-whenever I would ask to integrate those skills into our sessions I felt resistance and he would tell me that he wasn't familiar with these techniques-yet, he was the person who sent me there to learn! It felt like I was hitting my head against a wall. sheesh!

Plus, during the Fall and Christmas holidays, there were many times that I couldn't see him because either the office was closed for the holidays, he was out of town, or sick. During that time, I noticed how much better I felt and re-connected my relationship with God and got involved with the church (worship, study & volunteering).

So, over Christmas, I decided to say good-bye to my T. When I saw him, I let him know that I didn't want to see him any longer and laid out the reasons. It was empowering but he kept trying to keep me-to stay with him. He had me agree to see him again even though I didn't want to. I ended up apologizing to him for being honest with him! (Even now, I'm seething with rage at feeling manipulated.) He's good, very good. He never took any responsibility-never acknowledging how I felt. He just kept asking questions and got really excited when I agreed to see him again. (My red-flag-o-meter went into high alert even though I didn't understand why.) I've been out of sorts since then and I miss not talking to someone. I'm just not sure that someone needs to be him. So, I emailed him that I needed a break-maybe, a really long break. I've yet to hear back from him. I thought I would hear something from him but no, not a peep! Which, seems and feels wierd. Is it wierd? Maybe? Yes? No?

Did I make the right choice? Should I go back to him? Or, see someone new? Should I talk to him about all of this...again? Your thoughts and suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

 

[ladee]

Sounds like you are very smart and intuitive to your needs. Your last email to him is enough.
You don't owe him an explanation..you just owe yourself the right to heal.

Good for you! Your time with him is done!