Therapy questions for lcsw

[MrMoonlight]

So I have my first therapy (LCSW) appointment this week and am starting to freak out. I am wondering if you all could give me some advice/guidance.

I need to be prepared with my notebook and a few important questions to ask though right now I have none. I know when I get there my mind will go blank because mild panic will take hold.The payment schedule is all worked out but never having been to therapy I have no idea what to ask.

Could you please give me your top 3 questions you would ask if you were in my shoes?

I will be seeing her for :
PTSD
Social Anxiety Disorder
General Anxiety Disorder
Major Depression
Possibly Conversion Disorder (when highly anxious I can lose my vision)

Edit: to add questions from thread below

1) what type of therapy do you recommend (psychiatrist recommended EMDR) and how long does it take?
2) how many times per month?
3) What is your style of treatment?
4) Do you accept and respond to email/phone calls between sessions?
5) How could your involvement in my healthcare affect my SS disability claim?
6) what will she will do when I don't know what to talk about


Thanks for your time…

 

[Freida]

First - Stop thinking so hard - it's not a test. I know because I did the same thing at my first appointment! What can I say - it's a control thing. Then I was so nervous in the waiting room I almost passed out. ;)

I like the questions you have already thought of but even more important -- what is it you want out of therapy? What do you want to accomplish? When you think of your challenges, which one is the most important to you? Which symptom bothers you the most?

For example --- when I originally went to therapy it was to learn coping skills for dealing with the pain from fibro. I had no idea they would diagnosis me with ptsd. But even after the diagnosis we stayed with my original complaint -- dealing with pain -- until I had some coping skills. Then we moved on to the next thing. It wouldn't have done me any good to jump into the ptsd thing because I hurt to much to concentrate.

The reason I ask is a good therapist uses different techniques to accomplish different outcomes. They may have 4 people come in with PTSD, but each one of them will be bothered by a different symptom. The better you can narrow down what the outcome looks like to you, the things you would like to work on or learn more about, the better they will be able to build a plan with you.

 

[UnicornSightings]

Have you read her profile on Psychology Today? You should be able to figure out her style from that and get some more questions based off what you discover. If you plan to contact her between sessions I'd find out her policy on that and if she accepts emails and if she replies generally or not. I assume you'll tell her (or already have) that you're brand new to therapy. I'd ask (because my first therapist was just silent most of the time) what she will do when you don't know what to talk about. It's the worst when they just stare at you and wait. Always made me more anxious. Ask how you will check in with your goals to see how they're met. I went in with random stuff but nothing specific. It was my fatal flaw but I learned a lot from the entire experience with my last t. What I personally didn't know when starting therapy is that there is no such thing as perfectly healed. I really thought there was. I thought I'd go a few months, finally talk about my past and then I'd be better lol!!!! Sounds so silly now but I doubt I'm alone in expecting that. There can certainly be things that improve so my question to you for your goals is what exactly do you want to be better? Do you want to get better at talking to people (just being in therapy will help with that btw, it did for me, asking for what I want, having a positive and stable experience with another human being, it was awesome). Do you want to learn coping skills for anxiety, ways to calm down, emotion regulation so your dark days aren't so dark, etc. Try to get specific on what exactly would improve the quality of your life. You don't have to work nonstop on those specific goals but it's so helpful to have things to focus on so you don't feel like you're wasting time. See if she gives homework and if you're ok with the type. My last t suggested workbooks and worksheets. I hate that type of homework so we had to change it up. EMDR will make you relive your darkest moments. Are you ready for that if that's what she offers? You have to be in an emotionally stable state and even if you are it will be difficult and painful. Think if you want to really explore your past with her or if you want to focus on how your life is now without going into intense detail. Here's the thing, how you do therapy is entirely up to you. It's an individual process so if you can, try not to compare to someone else's experience as it will be unique to you. And try to sit back when you meet with her and see what kind of vibe you get from her. The relationship is crucial. Does she seem like someone you could talk to for awhile? Ask her about herself. She should answer basic questions no problem but if she starts to go on and on about something RUN AWAY. You want someone that keeps you center stage and doesn't bring their personal stuff into the room so if she tells you about her problems then that's taking away from you. See if she's on time. Omg that's so important. See if she ends on time. See if she will write while you talk to her each session. I find that distracting and would rather the t listen and write stuff down later. How's her office? Can you see yourself spending a lot of time there? That's all I got for now. Consider if you want to know any of those questions. Good luck to you. First sessions are easy in that she will just be getting a lot of info for you so you won't need to plan out what to say so much. But have a list of questions, you don't need to memorize anything. And you could just hand it to her and have her answer if you get too anxious. That's perfectly normal. Let us know how it goes!!

 

[Stephernovas]

You're only job is to show up. Bring your notebook to jot down some information they provide. I would focus on feeling confident enough to ASK your questions, as I presume you may be overwhelmed with everything else going on. Their role is going to be to note your anxiety and to see where you are at in that moment and work from there. They will try to ease your experience by engaging in simple conversation. It's not a test. They want you to feel okay. Breathe and focus on it. Some of your questions may even be answered before you ask! :)

 

[desiderata310]

I remember my first session was filling out a form, (a basic how depressed are you kind deal) and having just a normal conversation and him asking why I was there. Dude had shown up late (he lived quite a ways away, it was raining and I was the only client that evening- he was building up his private practice) He actually caught me on my way out.

I remember asking if I would be 'done' with therapy treatment in 6-8 weeks. HA! it'll be 4 years come January.

I'm with everyone else. This isn't a test. You aren't in trouble. Be as honest as you feel you can be.
They actually don't think you are going to spill all the beans in the first session.

 

[UnicornSightings]

Yeah, think of it as an interview process. You can ask whatever you want. Therapy is all about YOU and what you want and need.

 

[Nessa7]

I would expect most of the appointment to be formulaic. They will have something that they say to every new patient that they see. They also have quite a lot of information that they need to collect from you. You might only have a few minutes at the end of the appointment to ask questions. You don't need to worry about filling the entire appointment with your questions and you will most likely be still starting out and getting to know each other in your next few appointments.

Having goals that you want to work towards is important. Putting a few goals in writing is a requirement for a lot of therepists. For two of the three therepists that I have seen that was something for the second appointment.

 

[Sandstone]

Is this a first therapy appointment, where you have already interviewed them and decided this is the person you want to work with? Your post starts out suggesting that, but then moves to the sort of questions you would ask before you decided to start work with them.

I'd suggest different things depending on what stage you are at

 

[MrMoonlight]

Thank you @Link Removed . You have given me so much to think about. Thank you for so much or your thoughtful time. Your first anointment sounds terrible. I can imagine myself doing that too. I lost my vision during my first assessment with my psychiatrist. Man that has me scared. I don’t ever want to go through that again. I also suffer from chronic migraine maybe I should mention that too...could be linked to possible conversion disorder I guess.

This is my own brain dump inspired by your post. I’ll have to condense and make more sense of this before Thursday.

What I want from therapy:

I want to know what happened to me 20 years ago when I mentally and physically crashed (I have a lot of “why’s” and “how’s” in my life). I want to know more about PTSD and how that can shape a boy of 12 years of age (let alone 50). I don’t want a “feeling” or “trigger” to send me into an angry, defensive irrational, scared and slightly paranoid state anymore. I’d like to have the ability to think clearly around people. I want to know my triggers. I want to trust more (including myself). I want to have easier relationships with my family members. I want to to stop black and white thinking and mind reading. I want to know myself. I want to understand my cogitative distortions. I don’t want to isolate anymore. I don’t want to be scared anymore. I want to stop my mind from “looping” over the same thing ad nauseam. I want to sleep better. I’m scared to have one more trauma in my life because I fear what I could be pushed to do to myself. I want to feel safe in my home and person. I wouldn’t mind seeing a future that doesn’t involve a rope. Emotional regulation.

I want to live in the here and now!
I just want calm and peace in my life.


Edit below:

Please, please, please don't be upset if I don't respond to your post right away. I have so much to do and am kinda stressed. I am reading all the posts and considering everything as I attempt to ready myself. Thanks everyone so much for being there for me today.

@Sandstone This therapist was recommended to me by my psychiatrist. He has a lot of trust in her which gives me confidence. Hope we make a connection.

 

[Tinyflame]

I really like your 'wants' in the post above , and relate to them. You can really express yourself well!

Good luck to you. :hug:

 

[MrMoonlight]

Thank you so much @Junebug .

*takes deep breath*

 

[Sandstone]

That makes sense. I think telling her what you wrote above would be a fantastic start. It conveys where you are now, but also contains so many seeds of hope. It can be different; it can be better.