Therapy

[LostOne1985]

Hello all,

I need some advice or help with my issue i am having. I don't know how to approach it or deal with it. I love all my children. I have 3 boys and they are all intelligent in their own ways.

I have a son that is 5 years old, he suffers from autism. I find myself sometimes getting impatient because of my condition. I have ptsd, anxiety, and suffer from depression.

I am a better father than what mines was to me or even what my mother was to me. I suffer from a lot of trauma thanks to my wonderful family (sarcasm. ) I want to be the best father. I want my children to know I am here for them. That everything I do is for them.

I just sometimes feel like I should be a better father. Even though I am a good one. I get down on myself. I guess because my dad abandoned me along with my mother. Am I just trying to over compensate?

Just wondering if any other dads with the same conditions and raising a child with autism .

 

[No12talk2]

Hello all,

I need some advice or help with my issue i am having. I don't know how to approach it o...

Well I have a similar situation with a few different twists. I have 4 children, my youngest daughter has autism, I have PTSD, DID, anxiety and blah blah blah I can totally relate to what you're talking about. My dad left physically when I was four and my mother left emotionally when I was four at which time every kind of abuse you could imagine started with the men she brought into our lives.

 

[No12talk2]

Oh yeah I guess the biggest difference is that I'm a mom instead of a dad Lol

 

[No12talk2]

I Knew when I was very young that I wanted to be different than my parents. So because I didn't see a good example parenting I just did everything totally opposite and usually went overboard! I was the room mother the scout leader whatever my kids were doing I was usually in charge of it because I always wanted to be there for them. That worked great until my PTSD and DID flared up. they had no idea who I was Because I wasn't acting like supermom!

 

[No12talk2]

The best thing I did w my daughter was to remind myself that SHE isn't the problem, but bc of MY CONDITION, her behavior was triggering me at times. I don't know where your son is on the autism spectrum and that makes a big difference in their behaviors.

 

[No12talk2]

If you can't find a DAD w the same circumstances who can offer some good advice, give me a shout. Sometimes the gender isn't as important as having the same circumstances. I'm a Parent of an autistic child, but I have also been an educator for years and have worked with autistic children and their parents who are having great difficulties at home. I certainly don't know everything but maybe I could give you some suggestions if you would like. I will be back on tomorrow

 

[digger]

Hi @LostOne1985

Not a dad, but I am a parent and I think there are probably a lot of people here who can identify with the part of wanting to be better parents to their own children than their parents were to them.

I notice you've titled this 'Therapy', but you don't mention therapy in your post - wondering if you wanted to expand on that a little? Are you already in therapy and wondering about bringing this up with your therapist? Or, considering therapy to maybe look at this?

I have a fairly good relationship with my son, he's 19 now, but in all honesty, I wish I had had the opportunity to access therapy when he was younger.

 

[Freedomfighter]

Hello all,

I need some advice or help with my issue i am having. I don't know how to approach it o...

Well, I am a mom, but know what you are talking about. When I first got PTSD I was like a loose cannon, very difficult and I remember feeling like a bad parent then. Nothing I could do about it, the only thing that I remember is pure rage for the stalkers that caused all this, that hurt me and my life to a point of never returning. What they did and still are doing is not only outrageous but criminal.

As I got along and with therapy got a little better I got more patient again. It is soooo tough to have PTSD and be a good parent, very very tough.

I curse the people every day that did that to me, can not believe that such loosers were able to hurt me so much.

 

[LostOne1985]

Well, I am a mom, but know what you are talking about. When I first got PTSD I was like a loose...

Hello,

That is how I am full of rage and I work out to try and get rid of it all so I do not bring it home. I feel bad because my kids deserve a better father. A father that has patience with them. I would die if anything happened to them.

-Jc

Well, I am a mom, but know what you are talking about. When I first got PTSD I was like a loose...

I am sorry that this happened to you.

If you can't find a DAD w the same circumstances who can offer some good advice, give me a shout. Som...

Sorry for the delayed response. Yes, I would love that