General Things People Say After A Break Up

[Wastinglight]

Sorry to hear you are feeling low @Wastinglight. Its still early days. Be kind to you...

Thanks @Sighs. It's the conflicting thoughts and feelings that really get me. How you can still be in love with someone, and still care deeply about them, but at the same time feel like you hate them with a passion?!!! How can you love someone, and yet not like them? This is a new experience for me, it's very hard to reconcile. I guess it's a self-protection mechanism - as if the anger will help to protect me from further pain (it's not working...). In any case, I'm not looking forward to the next time I see him. It won't matter if he has kind words for me or nasty ones, they will all twist the knife in my heart just the same. But I refuse to stop going to the club. He can break my heart, he can kick me out of his house and his life, but he will not take my favourite sport from me. He doesn't get to take that as well, he doesn't get everything his own way. I've lost enough.

 

[Purplemunchkin]

How can you love someone, and yet not like them?

I love my brother 2/4 but I don't like him. I want him to be happy, but I don't want anything to do with him at this point in time. I love my Mum, but she's the most selfish and self-centred person I know, and I often don't like her. I love my husband, but sometimes he is a (non-PTSD related) jerk and I don't like him for that hour or two.

I think sometimes you need to give in to the dark side, just not too much. When my first marriage failed I just wanted to hide away. But I made myself go to work everyday, and then I hid away and binge watched TV most evenings. I would make myself go out at least two evenings a week; usually once to the supermarket, and once to see a friend (even if that involved staying in and watching TV with them).

But this experience has destroyed my faith in love once again, and I just don't know if I will be able to try again. I've never loved anyone as much as I love C,

I used to feel that way too. I'm happy with my own company. Do I need to be with someone else? Am I better off just sticking to my friends and my cat?

You are a strong, independent lady with a gorgeous puppy at your side, and some good friends to back you up. You will get through this. You just need to be patient and gentle with yourself and you will see the sun shine again.

 

[Wastinglight]

I love my brother 2/4 but I don't like him. I want him to be happy, but I don't want anything to...

Thanks my dear. Today hasn't been too crash hot so far. I wasn't expecting him to come to the club this morning, but he did. It was pretty awful. I couldn't speak to him, I couldn't even look at him. If I had, I would have burst into tears. Or bitten his head off. Or both. At one point, he said something to me - I just walked around him and kept walking. Admittedly, it was pretty rude of me, and I don't even know what it was he was saying to me, but better to be rude than lose my shit. I can't imagine how awkward it must have been for everyone else there, but hopefully it will resolve itself somehow, in time. I guess I won't be this upset forever...

I've been suffering from dizzy spills and bad headaches over the past week, and it feels like they're getting worse. I don't know how they relate to my recent state of mind, but it feels like the two are linked.

I'm looking forward to the Christmas party tomorrow though, so that's something....

 

[medley29]

@Wastinglight, make sure you're taking care of yourself, hun. The dizzy spells and what not could very well be stress related, so just keep an eye on it. We all have odd reactions to stress at times. Stress makes me run random fevers at different times when I'm not sick.

It will get better. It just takes time, and you have to be patient and not be so hard on yourself. I'm dealing with some things in my life that aren't related to my sufferer, and it's so hard. But I have to look out for myself, just like you do. My heart is heavy with other things tonight. But we will get through it. I think you're very strong, going through all that you have and then handling this the way you have. Keep that head up.

 

[Amanda_j]

How you can still be in love with someone, and still care deeply about them, but at the same time feel like you hate them with a passion?!!!

Reading your posts I could have written them myself. It's such a confusing and painful time, a ptsd breakup is the worst kind IMO! I'm so angry at my ex, towards the end of our relationship he wouldn't communicate with me at all, unless it was sexual. He said all he was good for was sex. He said he didn't want to be that way. He would tell me that he loved me?! He told me he sincerely loved me and he blocked me while I was sleeping and left. I hate him and I love him and I miss him. It sucks. He left me thinking I am worthless. Sorry to rant on your thread! It's not easy, I'm sorry that you're going through this.