We were separated for 13 yrs and he never paid support but paid the house and utilities, so my income went to raising the kids. I had an accident before they were out of high school and am on permanent disability. He claims every cent he puts in, even for his kids as alimony and I have to claim it as income. The house is over 100 yrs old and I have spent every cent trying to maintain and sell it and my energy into the work (sweat equity). I have consulted with attorneys but they all want $5000 retainer and he has a good one and even though they say I am entitled to pension, he has never told me how much. He kind of moved back in a slowing beginning a couple yrs ago when we both agreed to go to marriage counseling. That did not work. The T said he had a communication disorder and depression. I have been told repeatedly that he is passive aggressive and it fits. He sabotages me. When we were married, if I went to grocery store he would lock me out of house for long time. He would chain the doors and lock self in bedroom and say he never heard me. Constant stuff like that and he has been doing ti again. He advised my daughter to stop pmt on check, then told me I was f...ing crazy that I did not trust daughter. He fought me on selling the house during 13 yr separation. Wont sign papers, won't accept offers though I put it on market 2 times and did all the prep. I finally gave up for a bit because of illness.
I don't know for sure that he rigged it, but he was doing it grudgingly. He grabbed a bunch of rakes and things up at one point, more than he could reasonably handle, and was knocking all kinds of stuff around and I offered to help and he declined, saying "you wanted all this stuff out" He put the wobbly shelf in the corner and was doing things in there while I was out of shed sorting stuff and putting things away. (He is hoarder, pack rat, and moves my things so I can't find them regularly). He took something to garage and did not come back so I proceeded organizing inside shed. There was wheel barrow and spreader and when spreader hit shelf, ax came down from somewhere, I think mid shelf and large open bag of fertilizer /turf builder from top of shelf. The fertilizer was not there initially I do know that because I remember moving it and could never lift it over my head to upper shelf. Other stuff fell too. I had flip flops on and jumped back but got sprayed with fertilizer.
He was not just laughing, he was smirking. I know I sound a bit paranoid. He was in garage (probably hiding from work). He has said he does not like women to tell him what to do and that I am masculine and emasculate him (long time ago) during dispute, but I think that is how he really feels. However, it is his mother that he jumps for and he lived with for all those yrs, he does not do much for me. I do my own work mostly. I have never been called masculine other than by him. I have always had to delegate because he does nothing but go to his work and resent female bosses too.
My eyes are red and swollen and throat is sore and nose feels like I inhaled clorox. I used a nasal rinse but not helping much. He has not even checked to see if I am ok and it was hour and half ago. Maybe it was just by accident . He says I got pushed down the steps last year but denies being the pusher. I have not accused him of anything and just locked myself in my bedroom for the night.
I have really screwed myself by letting him stay here again. He has taken over and makes things so miserable at times. My T wants me to rent out spare rooms (I have 7 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms.) He says he won't pay any bills if I do. She thinks I would be safer with others here.
