Hope4future
Silver Member
Hi. I've been looking around and posting/responding to threads on the forum for a few weeks now, but I haven't introduced myself. On some level that hasn't felt right. So here I am. I haven't said a word about my trauma to anyone, but my therapist, so this is difficult.
My biological father was emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive from as early as I can remember until I was in my early teens. Memories of that time in my life are sketchy. I have PTSD with dissociation, but not DID.
I've been in counseling of one sort or another for about 20 years. Not all of that with a trauma trained therapist, so although the non-trauma therapy was helpful with somethings, it wasn't until I started working with my current therapist that things really started to change for the better.
I struggle with a lot of what I see others grappling with: Trust, anxiety, isolation, self-harm, SI, staying present, feeling worthwhile, self-blame, flashbacks, and experiencing and expressing emotions.
I'm working hard on processing the trauma and healing for my own health and so I can be a better parent to my beautiful kids.
I appreciate the openness I've discovered on this forum. Hearing that others share similar fears, concerns, and challenges has helped me feel less isolated and more normal. I'd heard the explanation that PTSD is a normal reaction to abnormal circumstance , but in the middle of the storm it's hard to believe. It certainly feels like I'm weak and/or crazy. Reading others' experiences and seeing similar reactions has allowed me to get some distance and perspective on how I feel that I couldn't have gotten looking only at my story. So Thank you.
I hope to continue to learn and heal and I hope to be able to contribute some good to the community as well.
Thank you for listening. Take care.
My biological father was emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive from as early as I can remember until I was in my early teens. Memories of that time in my life are sketchy. I have PTSD with dissociation, but not DID.
I've been in counseling of one sort or another for about 20 years. Not all of that with a trauma trained therapist, so although the non-trauma therapy was helpful with somethings, it wasn't until I started working with my current therapist that things really started to change for the better.
I struggle with a lot of what I see others grappling with: Trust, anxiety, isolation, self-harm, SI, staying present, feeling worthwhile, self-blame, flashbacks, and experiencing and expressing emotions.
I'm working hard on processing the trauma and healing for my own health and so I can be a better parent to my beautiful kids.
I appreciate the openness I've discovered on this forum. Hearing that others share similar fears, concerns, and challenges has helped me feel less isolated and more normal. I'd heard the explanation that PTSD is a normal reaction to abnormal circumstance , but in the middle of the storm it's hard to believe. It certainly feels like I'm weak and/or crazy. Reading others' experiences and seeing similar reactions has allowed me to get some distance and perspective on how I feel that I couldn't have gotten looking only at my story. So Thank you.
I hope to continue to learn and heal and I hope to be able to contribute some good to the community as well.
Thank you for listening. Take care.
