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Truly An "and What Then?" Game...

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 28403
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(((@otakujome))))

It sounds like you are stuck in a very dissociative state and doing all you can think of to come back. I'm glad you posted.

It's futile trying to please people who can't be pleased. Some of us spend our lives trying to be "good enough", and get ulcers, nervous breakdowns, and lots of grey hair in the process. If you can start right now to let go of the need to be good enough, your life will be your own. It may take until you are out from under your parents' roof before you get clear on what is important to you, but you can begin right now to notice even the tiniest moments that give you clues. Don't go for the big stuff like the purpose of your life when you are feeling like this, just focus on little things. What books do you like? What is your favourite flavour of ice cream? What is your favourite colour? Those little things aren't frivolous, they make up who we are. In any given moment, what is a "successful" person experiencing? Only the present moment, and the present moment is experienced through the senses. Our senses are also one of the things that help us ground.

I hope you are able to come back to Earth soon. We want you here.
 
Why is there no feeling of acomplishemnt, why is there no PROMISED happyiness in the PROMISED land of success.

I know this is cheesy, but happiness isn't outside you. It isn't in some title, it isn't in some degree, it isn't in winning a competition.
True happiness lies in the full acceptance of oneself -and you are simply not there yet. Neither am I. Neither are a lot of us. But we are working on it.

You are blaming yourself for not being able to find "happiness" in outside factors, but it isn't your fault. Happiness never was in outside factors. Yes, they can make you feel good, for a short time. But that is not the same as reaching peace within, and being happy in your core.

Maybe your purpose now is to just be Otakujome and know that the "real you" doesn't equate what you are feeling right now or the state that you are in right now. I know that "being yourself" is incredibly hard when all these things are happening though.

I know words are just words right now. Maybe this helps more. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
 
Once you find that 'you' that is in there and recognize him as valuable, your search for happiness, I am certain, will unfold naturally. Be gentle with yourself [DLMURL="https://www.myptsd.com/c/members/28403/"]@otakujome[/DLMURL] , you are doing the best that you can right now. Just be mindful, and don't you give up on you. It will be okay, because right now you are making the man that you will one day be. And that man will be great and strong and proud because of your tenacity. :hug: :hug: :hug:

thought this was worth repeating :hug:
 
I can't stop crying. I don't know what to do. I just want a hug, no less, no more... Just somewhere safe and nice.
 
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