Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

[TruthSeeker]

I will obsessively rationalize why people will abandon me. I also fall into re-enactment and will isolate for a big chunk of time each day.

@Skywatcher -Could you help me understand your concept of reenactment? I think this describes what I do...like I'll think back over a situation that I have strong emotions over, and then be so angry I'll have a conversation with an invisible version of the person who hurt me....but you can be sure, in the end I told them ALL my feelings.....but they are clueless cause I'm speaking to thin air...just me. I spent a lot of wasted time, nothing is resolved, and I'm usually worked up more than when I started. Arg....is this reenactment?

 

[Friday]

Arg....is this reenactment?

Re-enactment is deliberately or unconsciously putting yourself through more of your original trauma.

Like an assault victim may start bar fights, or a crash victim may total a series of cars, a child who was abused may marry an abuser, a rape victim might engage in risky sexual behaviors that result in more sexual assaults, someone who was starved may refuse to eat, etc.

I can think of 4 or 5 different things what your talking about might be But it would be worth starting a thread on.

 

[Skywatcher]

@Wilbur, I am thankful for @Friday ‘s definitions of re-enactment. I don’t want to share details of what I do because it is a huge part of my shame.

 

[TruthSeeker]

Re-enactment is deliberately or unconsciously putting yourself through more of your original trauma.

Like an assault victim may start bar fights, or a crash victim may total a series of cars, a child who was abused may marry an abuser, a rape victim might engage in risky sexual behaviors that result in more sexual assaults, someone who was starved may refuse to eat, etc.

I can think of 4 or 5 different things what your talking about might be But it would be worth starting a thread on.

Ok-that makes sense and answers my question. Thank you.

@Wilbur, I am thankful for @Friday ‘s definitions of re-enactment. I don’t want to share details of what I do because it is a huge part of my shame.

I was just looking for something general to understand the concept. There are so many different words I don't understand, or am not sure I fully get the gist of. Don't want to respond and be off base....and with that, I clearly understand the need for personal privacy.

 

[ladee]

And I had the same question answered. Thanks, @Friday. I do this with 'abandonment. Pfttt, who knew. A deep sigh of relief. Now I know more than I did when I got up this morning.

 

[The Albatross]

So based on feedback what sayest thou Rodin? Does any of this assist you? How?

 

[Ronin]

Does any of this assist you? How?

It does, for I didn't bother thinking of why am I doing what I am doing / other than to deal with pressure and not having anything else to be doing / not wanting to return to things that made sense in different points of life but would be incompatible now.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

What are some of y’all most unhealthy coping mechanisms?

Oh wow. Well, ummm. Ok, well, porn. Very, VERY, harmful masturbation to replay my past. Thumb sucking which has lead to me buying an adult pacifier. Which is, meh! Prefer my thumb. Umm, what else? Oh, maladative daydreaming which my therapist allows and is ok with because then I am not doing the porn and harmful masturbation. Or, at least not as much.

At least cutting and cult rituals have been scratched off the list. As has addiction. My latest addiction was huffing keyboard duster which is a fast track to dead which is why I liked it so much. But, yeah. Not done any of that for a few years. Yay!

 

[Deanna]

My latest addiction was huffing keyboard duster which is a fast track to dead which is why I liked it so much. But, yeah. Not done any of that for a few years. Yay!

I did most of the things on here but wanted to direct this post to lostforgottensoul. I did Amway shoe spray when I was a kid ( not for very long) but it knocked me out for awhile. I just knew if I kept doing this stuff...it was going to rearrange my brain. I had to make everything stop for a few minutes because my brain was all messed up. I'm on medication so I don't know if that was the desire just to stop everything ( little at a Time) so I'm not running for anything now but I did. Food, alcohol.

 

[Lionheart]

The worst of the unhealthy coping mechanisms for me was using (high risk) sex to feel loved and alive and then when that failed (backfired) I used alcohol to deal with things. I got caught in a spiral of sexually acting out, (repetition compulsion), and alcohol addiction. It was slowly destroying me and exposing me to abuse and disease. When I was in between having anonymous sex and drinking myself into a stupor, I cut on myself with razor blades, (attention reduction behavior), and picked at my skin (excoriation disorder). I stopped drinking near my first day of therapy and learned to replace the coping mechanisms with healthier, more positive behaviors.