Virginia Tech - How Do Others Feel?

[hodge]

Is anyone else here feeling overwhelmed or triggered or set back by what happened at Virginia Tech today?

I feel so unreal. I felt like this on 9-11. This thing today brought back the memory of having to literally run for my life one time. I also am doing some work right now with a faculty member there, and I'm worried about him. I emailed him today but haven't heard back yet.

hodge

 

[Deleted member 93]

Surprisingly I was not moved at all. Biggest massacre in our history here... ever. But not a damn thing. I felt a little guilty about lack of emotion but then it dawned on me. These college kids killed by gun fire, the number is so small compared to our current war. Those are kids the same age dying over there. Kids, all of it, kids.

I guess it was for me like my usual channel flipping and run across a report of death. This one did make me pause as normally I am anti news. But I saw the details and then put it on cartoons. I guess my way of shutting it out.

9-11 screwed me up as I was in such a state of shock when I was called and woken up (I worked nights then) and turned on the TV in time to see live feed of the second plane. That shocked the shit out of me and my jaw dropped. This I just felt zero. Desensitized I guess.

 

[hodge]

I do know what you mean, veiled. My husband remarked that this would be considered a mild day in Iraq, and I think he's absolutely right. Still, it triggered me badly. Hate to say it, but I guess I've become desensitized to what's happening in Iraq. It's so overwhelming. Also, I've suffered on that war a long, long time. I knew what would happen down the road when it started, and, unfortunately, I was not proven wrong. So I learned a long time ago that I had to really ration myself on that news because it was just too much, too devastating. This thing today, however, just came out of nowhere, hence, the powerful trigger, I guess.

 

[goingonhope]

hodge, yes! I'm feeling very overwhelmed by it. It brought me to tears upon finding out that 22 people were killed and now dead, and how. That was before I learned that there were others that had been killed. And, I could say so much more, but I really can't say anymore tonight, I can't even think about it, as I just must get some sleep tonight, though I will anyhow as I lay down in bed.

What happened is so real and horrific that yes, I will be completely overwhelmed and further triggered by it, once my sheer exhaustion passes and the sun hopefully rises again tommorrow.

....(((many hugs))) for each of you.


I knew I shouldn't have responded to this post tonight, bc it has me in tears again, and is just to f'n incomprehensible for me.

Hope

 

[hodge]

Hope, I'm so sorry. I can appreciate how you feel. I really hope you get some decent sleep tonight. I just have felt the need to try to talk about it and not feel so alone and isolated in my suffering over this. Please take care, and let's hope things feel less crazy tomorrow.

Hodge

 

[Linda]

Sucks.
I am so angry now. Why the security were unable to stop him? Why nobody else had a gun to shoot back? Why after all the gun was sold to a non-citizen?
That sucks. I can imagine so vividly someone enters the room and starts to shoot people.
Hell.

 

[Monarch]

veiled, here is the difference I see with this tragedy at VT and the Iraq war. Our kids, our troops know they are in danger everyday, they prepare for that mentally everyday and everyday they work hard to stay alive. These kids at VT do now live with guns attached to their bodies, they had no clue that they would have a gun pointed at them on that day, it isn't part of their everyday lives.

 

[Monarch]

I meant to say, these kids at VT do not live with guns attached to their bodies, sorry for the misspelling.

 

[mouse]

From a Canadian, at first I heard another shooting in the states, thought nothing of it then as the day wore on it slowly started to creep up on me these kids were in school training and learning the skills and knowledge so that they would make a difference in the world no matter how big or small they would put ther fingerprint in history. Now there are some who were snuffed out before there flame could burn bright and the idea of the thoughts and dreams and goals and ideas and how each would make ther mark, it began to very much upset me not only the sheer volume but the whole idea. To all those who lost a loved one I grieve with you for those that have died and been injured I salute you you died in a very different type of war. One with no soldiers but kids unarmed kids. I cant go on the sorrow has strangely gripped me . God have mercy on there souls

 

[hodge]

Monarch, I think you make an excellent point. It's the difference between expecting it and being prepared for it and not expecting it nor being prepared for it -- that makes all the difference.

I was relieved to learn today that the faculty member I'm working with is okay. His grandson was in the dorm where the first shooting took place; he's okay too and now staying with his grandparents for awhile.

I couldn't bring myself to watch the convocation, though a bit later I wondered if it would have helped. I don't know. I've tried to do so much work on myself today to get in a better place. And I have gotten to a better place for some moments, but I sure didn't get much of my job-work done. I just really hope tomorrow is a better day, and I'm trying to work on making that happen.

 

[Grama-Herc]

Well, as some one with agoraphobia along with her ptsd and all the other demons in her head, this has proven to be a rather difficult time for me. I am teriified to leave my house most of the time and when I get to a point where I am finally able to venture out with some control, the world and it's crazies put me into a tail spin and back into the house I go. I realize that this is a very selfish statement but isn't this forum the best place for us to express our feelings? My heart goes out to any and all people who have suffered a loss at the hands of this young man. But it only goes to show how not handling the young man and his problems in a proper and timely manner can escalate into a tragedy that could have been avoided if someone was just paying attention.

 

[Monarch]

absolutely, in America you can force someone to be hospitalized if they threaten to hurt themselves but if they threaten to hurt others you actually have to wait until they do it for them to be committed and then they go to jail instead of a hospital. our treatment for mentally ill and unstable in this country is rediculous.