Want To Find A New Therapist But I'm Scared To?

[Liana]

Currently I am seeing a clinical nurse, who really only asks me about the weather. She's useless, doesn't think I have PTSD, which I am pretty certain I do. She referred me to a psychiatrist a month ago, and I had an assessment for depression and at the end of it the psychiatrist told me I was fine and just being a teenager.

My therapist agrees with her, and says that I am just a teenager with a bad history. I am furious at this, I'm 16, so I understand their hesitation to diagnose me with anything, however, my symptoms are obvious and it's almost disabling. I got kicked out of college because I couldn't go in due to triggers but my therapist said I was fine and that it's normal.. my traumatic experience happened 3 years ago for 2 months. And then again about 7 months ago. I know, this isn't normal. I know what normal feels like and this isn't it.

I was thinking, I want help, so I should ring my doctors and see what they say but I am terrified. I've had so many people tell me that I am just being a teenager and I don't want that again. It's humiliating. I also don't want it to seem like I am trying to do their job or anything so yeah.. I'm also bad at talking to people, especially about what happened so I don't know how to get it across to them..

What should I do? Also, my mum seems to think I am fine as does my boyfriend (though he is more supportive and just wants to think I am fine, which I am working around), so I wouldn't tell either of them about going to the doctors until afterwards. I'm worried about what they'd say..

Should I ring them anyway?

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Well, I think you have the support of everyone here to find a new doctor. I hope that counts!

It's one thing for a doctor to say you're fine, a different thing for family to say it. Doctors are trained to examine specific symptoms whereas family members sometimes slip into denial for various reasons.

For what it's worth, I don't think this is a case of just being a teenager. I think you've endured bad things in your past and deserve treatment. I think it's time for a whole new treatment team. Please don't feel like you're trying to do their job. YOU know yourself best, and if the trauma has effected you, then you deserve treatment, period. A lot of people are dismissed when they see a doctor (for various reasons, not just PTSD), and aren't diagnosed until they see a specialist. That may be the case here.

I encourage you to reach out and find new help. It's scary and I know you're young, but please get the help you need now. If you wait until you're older, you may very well likely get worse. I only say the "young" thing because I was dismissed when I was about your age. The therapist told me I was "fine" because I came from a good home with good parents and got good grades and didn't get into trouble. Yeah, because ALL kids who have issues turn into delinquents. *rolls eyes*.

 

[Bedbug]

It might be worth first making contact with one of the many charities who can offer advice and support: Women's Aid, Rape Crisis, Mind, One in Four, etc. Just search for "sexual assault charity UK". Depending on where in the UK you live, you might get better help from one of these charities than from the NHS.

 

[Liana]

Thank you Solara, I rang the doctors about 2 minutes ago and got an appointment for Friday so I guess this thread is a bit of a waste of time. However, I am still terrified out of my mind. But, I guess I'll go and see what they say and hope they don't put me down like the last two professionals I have seen.

Bedbug, I would speak to other charities like that but they only offer advice and such, not treatment (usually) so the NHS is my only option really. I would also go private but my family doesn't have the money and that would mean talking to my mum about it, just so she can tell me I am overreacting again.

 

[Bedbug]

No, many charities do offer treatment. They may ask for a donation, but will not insist on it. Look into it.

 

[Liana]

Oh, okay. I will have a look. Thanks.

 

[Bedbug]

I'm probably being overly pessimistic about NHS mental health services because I don't have any decent support in my area. I deal with the local Community Mental Health Team as part of my job. Quite apart from the fact that I would not feel comfortable talking to any of them about personal issues, I really don't think the team would be able to help me. The GPs at my local practice don't hold them in very high regard either.

You might have more luck, but your doctor might just refer you back to the people you have already seen. Speaking to some of these charities may give you a back up plan.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Please don't think this thread is a waste of time. You're getting support from us, and that's what counts! This process isn't easy for anyone. It is hard to reach out.

 

[Bedbug]

I'm also bad at talking to people, especially about what happened so I don't know how to get it across to them.

I forgot that I wanted to say something about this.

The first time I saw my doctor about this, I don't think I spoke a single word. I was in a bad state and my husband asked the doctor to come out to our house. When he arrived my husband handed him my iPod on which I had written a long piece about how I was feeling and in which I admitted for the very first time that I had been sexually abused as a child. We all sat in silence for a very long time while he read it. It took another two or three visits before I could speak to him. I just kept giving him stuff to read.

It might be helpful to you to try writing a few things down before you see your doctor on Friday. What you wrote in your other thread would be a really good start, as well as what you wrote on this one. If you find yourself struggling to talk to your doctor, let them read it.

 

[Liana]

Thank you both, I appreciate the time you've both taken.

I have written down the majority of my symptoms, but I find it impossible to even think about what happened never mind talk about it or write it - I have tried both and usually just end up in a pool of tears. I can still give them the symptoms I wrote down, but I am not sure what to do about talking about my history - I am praying that the psychiatrist I spoke to wrote notes about it which I could mention, maybe.

 

[Echo]

I agree with @Bedbug. It is really hard to get across what you want to say in the short time of an appointment with your doctor. So you don't forget to say something major or find you can't actually say it at the time, another thing to do would be to write some bullet points down or brief notes so you can point to them. You can hand that to the doctor and say you want to discuss these things. If he/she then wants to make another appointment with you so there is enough time, he/she knows what you will need to discuss in advance. I always feel very rushed at the doctors and it is easy to get side-tracked by a question you weren't expecting.

Good for you for insisting and sticking up for yourself. You know things are not right. Everyone else in your family perhaps just doesn't want to face the truth. And as for the previous professionals, perhaps they weren't well enough trained to spot the key things in what you were saying or to ask the right questions to make sure.

 

[Echo]

@Liana - looks like our last posts crossed. Take what you already have to the doctors. Make a copy; keep one for you and hand the rest to the doctors. Can you also just write brief phrases to indicate what happened to you, rather than write out the full story? That would upset me terribly, too, as I am sure it would many of the people on here who are also starting out.