Want to Hurt Inner Child

[Overcoming]

@meander I wish that there was an answer... I usually try to emotionally numb, if possible, and hope that it eventually passes. I have only been able to wait it out. I have found that crossing my arms around my body and leaning into the corner of two walls (with no one watching of course) can simulate the feeling of a hug. That gives some relief, or at least I am able to release some tears in private.

 

[PreciousChild]

Hi @Overcoming. I don't know if this post is helpful. It's something that I'm going through, and thought I'd share. Lately, I've been allowing myself to feel anger and explore it. I'm not acting on it on anyone.

For some reason, I haven't used the term "reparenting", but I do think it's helped me a lot to reimagine my relationship with my parents. But the last time I was in meditation, it was about letting my child self tell my dad 'no' and to give words to the ways it messed her up to be given all sorts of crap. It was really hard to articulate what was so messed up about what he and my mom did to her/me. Some of it was so primordial that it was hard to put into words.

I know you're anger is directed at your child self. But from my reading on ptsd, I understand that the source of anger comes from unmet needs from childhood, and that it's the same core of anger when we grow up whether we turn it against others or ourselves.