Warning A Doctor About Possible Flashbacks

[Venusian]

Good luck angel! You can do this! I can be a pocket rider if you want one.

 

[Innordinate]

My wife tells my Doctors for me because she knows I won't tell them for the most part. Rather suffer through instead of get special treatment.

The times I have told them I did it because I was more afraid I'd hurt them, scare them, than any reason for my comfort.


I hope you're appointment went/goes well for you and that you managed to tell them and not just suffer through as more punishment.

 

[BloomInWinter]

One of the hallmarks of being an abused child is that we learned not to trust anyone...and to fear authority figures and disapproval.

A doctor is a powerful authority figure, and many who never had the abuse we did are afraid of them.

Just telling your doctor honestly what you are facing is an act of courage, because you are risking being hurt again. But if we don't...then we are for sure not going to get the help we need, either.

Trust yourself, tell your doc, and you will then know if that person is trustworthy and will have choices based upon more info.

 

[BloomInWinter]

If living with this stuff isn't a daily act of great courage, I don't know what is, ((((((angel2write))))).

 

[maddog]

Absolutely! Sometimes it is the aspects of so-called ordinary mundane life that require the most courage, perhaps it is only we here and those like us who truly understand that fact.

Not only does childhood abuse teach us to mistrust authority figures, it also teaches us to endure suffering without protest and without any belief that we deserve better. I hope and trust that between you and your husband and your doctor, you found a way to make sure you were as comfortable and felt as safe as possible during this procedure - you deserve it.

Maddog

 

[KP the nut]

(((Angel))) I have a candle burning for you and I'm sending positive thoughts to you and Bear.

 

[angel2write]

I told him. I lived through it. And the procedure went well.

I did ok until I misunderstood something the doctor said. I stayed in the room undressed when I was supposed to dress and go somewhere else. He had to tell me twice. I majorly freaked out. Then had to sit in the waiting room until the ultrasound room was open. Two guys from the base came in (with their pregnant wives) and I ended up boxed in to a tiny waiting room by military guys in uniform. I finally lost it. Cried in front of everybody. Broke down and started begging Bear to take me home over and over. He smushed me up in a hug and let me cry all over his shirt.

But they eventually got me into the ultrasound room. Then I freaked out at all the medical equipment and couldn't sit down and let the nurse do the procedure. She finally left me in there with my husband, who managed to get me sat down. Got it done. Got out. The checkout nurse took one look at my face and said, "We can bill you. You want us to just bill you?"

Oh yeah.

But it's done. I can't say I'm proud of myself. It was so humiliating to have to tell the doctor. He didn't react great. He got nervous, I think, and started joking all around with the nurse. But they did try to keep an eye on me. I don't know if telling him helped, or if it made it worse because it made me more self-conscious and him more nervous.

I'm just glad it's over. Thank you all for even caring & leaving me notes. It's incredibly comforting. Thank you.

 

[KP the nut]

(((Angel))) rest and recover now.

I can't say I'm proud of myself

You may not be able to say it BUT, I will. I'm proud of you, You did it, yes it was hard, yes you needed Bear and together you got through it, teamwork of the best sort. It is done.

Take time now to process your thoughts. Breathe, ground and be kind to yourself.

 

[maelstrom]

So glad to hear that you got it done with, angel2write! That was really brave of you, and you should be proud of yourself for having done that without running away or anything. But yes I know how hard it must have been--why don't you give yourself a reward? Treat yourself to something nice, and take a hot shower/bath afterward? Hope you don't have to do this again soon. Hugs.

 

[NIKI]

You did a great job Angel. I'm proud of you. I'm so glad you have a wonderful husband to hold your hand and help give you courage.

I glad it's over for you. (((Hugs)))

 

[Meadowsweet]

(((Angel2write)))

 

[amethist]

You did it Angel, and Bear took care of you too.