Childhood Was this a wrong behaviour?

[Vero]

Recently I started to reflect more about my childhood and I remembered certain things I never thought about before but I'm not sure what meaning to give them... I'm really embarrassed by what I'm about to write, even if it may seem like not a big deal at all.
Well, throughout my childhood my grandmother used to touch and grab me inappropiately (I'm a woman btw) just for like a second or two, in a playful way, I have no idea why. I never liked it and as I grew older she stopped. My mom, on the other hand, used to kiss me often on the lips, until I was a teenager.
I guess it depends on the culture, but looking back I think these gestures brought me a lot of shame, especially as I grew older. Would this be considered like a game you have with children, or signs of affection, or was it inappropriate?

 

[Gs172003]

Recently I started to reflect more about my childhood and I remembered certain things I never thought about before but I'm not sure what meaning to give them... I'm really embarrassed by what I'm about to write, even if it may seem like not a big deal at all.
Well, throughout my childhood my grandmother used to touch and grab me inappropiately (I'm a woman btw) just for like a second or two, in a playful way, I have no idea why. I never liked it and as I grew older she stopped. My mom, on the other hand, used to kiss me often on the lips, until I was a teenager.
I guess it depends on the culture, but looking back I think these gestures brought me a lot of shame, especially as I grew older. Would this be considered like a game you have with children, or signs of affection, or was it inappropriate?

I kiss my granddaughter on the lips. She's 6. It means absolutely nothing. I kissed my kids on the lips until they got older then I would kiss them on the face somewhere. As far as your grandma it depends on the context. My mom would slap my butt ( never nude) on rare occasion but it wasn't in a bad way it was just to be silly and evoke a reaction. It's hard to explain in writing but there were no overtones, it was just joking around. Hugging my husband means something much different than hugging my kids. Kissing my husband does too. Ect. Ect.

 

[The Albatross]

What issues in adulthood are you having to the degree that you are trying to determine this? I expect there is difficulty somewhere?

 

[Mee]

It’s wrong if one person doesn’t want it, and it’s not inappropriate to a relationship of power.

It’s not wrong if it’s ok for both people involved.

So you might feel it’s ok to kiss one grandma on the lips and not another. You might have friends you are physically affectionate with and others with whom there is no physical contact.

 

[Sideways]

in a playful way, I have no idea why.

It may have been exactly as you described it. Playful.

My nan thought a slap on the arse was ‘playful’. My word for it would be irritating and unwelcome, but to her? Playful.

As for your mum? I have 4 siblings, and each of us copped kisses on the lips looooooong after it was welcome. Smooches from the folks - gross! But that was then, before kids were taught “my body, my choice”. Back then it was considered the height of rudeness not to cop a smack on the lips from mum and dad.

I’m with @The Albatross - I’d be looking more towards why this is coming up for you now.

 

[hithere]

can you be more specific about where this grandmother would grab you? Are you talking about chest/breast area, buttocks, or crotch? or arm, leg?