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General What are they thinking?

Thread starter #1,177
The same line may read as "You are a f*ckup failure as a human being and professionally alike... and people die and will die. Because of it. Because of YOU."
Yep. Applies to first responders also. People die when you aren't brave.

I think that's what is so hard for others to understand. The level of responsibility is enormous - and when you screw up it can be catastrophic. So you go into hypervigilent "gotta save them" mode.

We know it doesn't make sense because the threat is gone. But.
Then it just becomes waiting for the next one. Thats part of the fun of ptsd. You KNOW how badly things can go - so you have to make sure it won't even if the environment you are in is completely different.
 
Political/pandemic/mask/healthcare opinions may or may not be related to PTSD. Even if they are related to PTSD and trauma, it doesn't mean he is divorced from his opinions. Stupid or not.

Example: I am very concerned about the virus. I am wildly high risk (crappy lungs) for any respiratory bug. I wear n95 masks with a valve, because they let me walk out the door. Anything else and I'm either too anxious (less strong mask) or coughing (no valve). I cover the mask with cloth to protect others. I wear the n95 under the cloth mask to protect me. I use the valve (under the cloth) to help everyone as my coughing from the damn mask itself doesn't help anyone. Just freaks everyone out!

Some would judge me a coward. Some would judge me brave. I don't care. Really, life is too damn short to care. I do what I need to do. Also, yeah, I have become dizzy from it. I take mask breaks at work (go outside) and I am following trends in mask development to see what they design to eliminate this issue.

I have a friend with PTSD who can not, just can not, wear anything on her face. She has tried, but too much trauma floods in. She had to quit a job because of it. I have another friend who has PTSD who just hates masks because to her they are a sign of social control by big givernment, and that freaks her out more than any virus. I have another friend who is anti-mask because she has a very nervous son who gets freaked out with all the masks everywhere reminding him of the virus. The unseen threat. I also have plenty of friends with trauma histories who have pro or anti mask opinions that have nothing to do with trauma or mental illness.

It's a shitty time. People cope in different ways and have different levels of comfort with risk and different levels of trust in government.

It's a courage to change the things I can (what I choose to do for my health and life)... and also have acceptance for what I can't change (others)... kind of thing for me.
 
Ditto, people may well have political triggers - as in genuine triggers in the PTSD sense - but that doesn't grant a right to harass or abuse others for their choices.

And it'd still be better for public health if they could overcome their triggers at least for the time's sake if that is in the way of protecting health and lives of others.

As in I grok that is tough. PTSD is hard. Yet people infected & dying are IMO a worse risk, and take priority.

It's an uneasy situation, to be sure.
 
If only overcoming triggers were so easy!


I am fine with masks but have sympathy for those who aren’t.

I find there is a precedent in this situation however - smoking and second hand smoke. Many cultures decided the risk of second hand smoke to those who chose not to smoke was a unfair - so protected non smoking u luv and workers with a ban on smoking in public enclosed areas. In these jurisdictions People are still perfectly entitled to smoke - where it Does not have same impact on others - outside, in their homes etc .

I think people who genuinely cannot suffer masks should be supported to work and remain in their own environments - shopping online/ by phone and having things delivered to their door - and not risk others in enclose spaces or the close proximity.

We all know we cannot totally have others cater to our triggers In normal times - nor have them risk others . Now perhaps others can have some compassion towards us as they have some enhanced understanding of living with restrictions - and triggers do restrict us.
 
Thread starter #1,183
The thing I find funny is that almost every business here has a sign that says "no shoes no shirt, no service" and no one bats an eye. But if you add "no mask" people lose their shit.

the level of selfishness and lack of caring about others in America is just disgusting. I get it....masks might help might it might not blah blah. But if there is ANY chance it could save a life why wouldn't you want to do it? And I'm a cynical person!

then I think about the idiots that won't wear seatbelts or who drive drunk and I realize....a lot of people really just don't care. So if they die I'm ok with that - it's their choice. It's when they kill others thru their stupidity that I get cranky

I think it is a trigger for me because my ptsd comes from other people's choices. People who didn't care if I lived or died -- as long as I wasn't an inconvenience to them.
 
Masks are so hard for me. It feels like I'm holding my breath under water. I cant have things over my mouth so its just like I'm holding my breath. I go for a few mins, find an alone place, take it off and take a few breaths and go for a few more mins and find another alone place to take breaths and rinse and repeat. Its so triggering but I'm doing it. So hard tho.
 
Thread starter #1,185
I go for a few mins, find an alone place, take it off and take a few breaths and go for a few more mins and find another alone place to take breaths and rinse and repeat
I hate that you have to do this. I've been triggered really badly a couple times by mine too. But I am eternally grateful that you will try to wear one and if you need to get away from it you do it in a way that doesn't risk others. That's a pretty rare thing these days :hug:
 
I want to applaud all of the sufferers here for explaining how an isolate and shut out happens for them. My being a supporter am still learning how to not have my feelings present when dealing with this. My sufferer ended our relationship with an argument and then left me without a word of explanation of his needing to isolate, nor that I wouldn’t hear from him either for a while or forever. I have to explain from a supporters point of view, if we love you and support you as we say we do, this type of hurt is unexplainable. I understand that I shouldn’t take things personally, but it’s hard not to. I can’t believe that someone that claims to love you would be so callus and uncaring. Please understand by no means am I minimizing this type of illness, but I guess I still don’t understand. I’m currently giving space by not contacting him at all; and since he’s blocked me on social media, I can’t contact him there. So I’m saying all of this to say, I’m still completely lost on how to be more supportive and what more I can do? I welcome any nd all advice from sufferers and supporters alike.
I get both sides of this. Choosing to be a supporter.....also should have some boundaries.....and because you are a supporter.....it doesn't feel good to get trashed on by a sufferer.....but with that said, it is not controlled or intentional in most cases. Sometimes, leaving in my car, for a day was the only way I could get grounded, the only way I could find my breath, the only way I could make sense of things.....isolation is safe and my car, nature, ...and my camera...always a way to find my way back from an overwhelming situation....to a place I could think......Also, it was important not wanting anyone to know what I was going thru because it can be a crazy feeling in the moment......And at those times, I was not able to process my own feelings.....much less worry about emotional fall out.....or anyone else's feelings. In that moment, where life is overwhelming and trauma is doing it's dance in my head, or it feels unsafe or a reliving of the past, there were times that there was no room for a supporter.....there was no room for anyone else. How do you say this to a supporter.....you don't. You just leave. As things got better.....my ability to express my needs improved.....and then some friendship rules were kinda agreed upon.....will text where I am when I cool off......will let the person know I'm okay.
I'm fortunate, my friend.....doesn't take it personally and just gives me space when that's all she can do.....and now.....It got much better over time......
 
Masks are so hard for me. It feels like I'm holding my breath under water. I cant have things over my mouth so its just like I'm holding my breath. I go for a few mins, find an alone place, take it off and take a few breaths and go for a few more mins and find another alone place to take breaths and rinse and repeat. Its so triggering but I'm doing it. So hard tho.
I just wanted to thank you for wearing one nevertheless.

The thing I find funny is that almost every business here has a sign that says "no shoes no shirt, no service" and no one bats an eye. But if you add "no mask" people lose their shit.

the level of selfishness and lack of caring about others in America is just disgusting. I get it....masks might help might it might not blah blah. But if there is ANY chance it could save a life why wouldn't you want to do it? And I'm a cynical person!

then I think about the idiots that won't wear seatbelts or who drive drunk and I realize....a lot of people really just don't care. So if they die I'm ok with that - it's their choice. It's when they kill others thru their stupidity that I get cranky

I think it is a trigger for me because my ptsd comes from other people's choices. People who didn't care if I lived or died -- as long as I wasn't an inconvenience to them.
I like to compare it with wearing a bra. Wearing a bra is far more discomfortable then wearing a mask. At least for me. Yet, society expects us to wear one and do we hold anti-bra-rallies? No, we don’t.

I am not sure if all of them realize that not wearing a mask is a selfish thing to do. I think some are really delusional and think wearing a mask have all kind of negative consequences for themselves and others.
 
Masks are so hard for me. It feels like I'm holding my breath under water. I cant have things over my mouth so its just like I'm holding my breath. I go for a few mins, find an alone place, take it off and take a few breaths and go for a few more mins and find another alone place to take breaths and rinse and repeat. Its so triggering but I'm doing it. So hard tho.

Like others I want to thank you for doing more than someone without this trigger to support others. You deserve to be commended for this.

I really hope it gets a little easier for you with exposure , but I am sad you have to put yourself through it. You rock for your perseverance.
 
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