RVA21
VIP Member
A mixture today, sad for a while but later I felt amused and content.
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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?
- Post starter goingonhope
- Start date
RVA21
VIP Member
Still feeling fairly amused, learning from mistakes and not making those again.
Thankful I didn't see who I thought would be inevitable tuesday. Most people want to see someone, I want not to.
Amazed I'm nearly done the Christmas stuff, which usually takes me to about Dec 23rd! Am giving a present early today, as I want to. And I hate waiting. :)
Relieved I have perfect excuse to be absent from one party.
Dreading christmas day= 1st time with family in over a decade. Relieved I thought of small surprise for the morning, hopefully they will like it.
Curious how party on wednesday will be.
Anxious to the point of death-is-better for something likely required upcoming at work, so have decided not to think about it atm.
Mistrusting of others to some degree.
Grateful that I can choose to challenge mistrust, but don't know which way I will go. Unsure, unless I just choose.
I guess I really just feel like I should leave.
Have to go out tonight, or should, but hope it will be brief if I di. I am exhausted.
Thankful for kind, wise people.
Thankful for good shopping deals, because at each step I said a prayer. Needed one item for work (yuck), had a 25$ gift cert from a friend last summer, it was on sale from 50+$ to 26. :)
Really need sleep and hope, overall. And peace. And, though I'm not really materialistic- a new pointsettia. :) But I don't like how genetically engineered most are in the store. Well, I don't need it, so it's a want. Cool. ? :laugh: But I guess my last one was about 3-4 years old, and I got attached to it blooming almost year round. But it was a real happy connotation, that I could overcome a crappy trigger, so I feel really blessed. :)
It's hard for me to see any progress in myself, or remember progress.
Amazed I'm nearly done the Christmas stuff, which usually takes me to about Dec 23rd! Am giving a present early today, as I want to. And I hate waiting. :)
Relieved I have perfect excuse to be absent from one party.
Dreading christmas day= 1st time with family in over a decade. Relieved I thought of small surprise for the morning, hopefully they will like it.
Curious how party on wednesday will be.
Anxious to the point of death-is-better for something likely required upcoming at work, so have decided not to think about it atm.
Mistrusting of others to some degree.
Grateful that I can choose to challenge mistrust, but don't know which way I will go. Unsure, unless I just choose.
I guess I really just feel like I should leave.
Have to go out tonight, or should, but hope it will be brief if I di. I am exhausted.
Thankful for kind, wise people.
Thankful for good shopping deals, because at each step I said a prayer. Needed one item for work (yuck), had a 25$ gift cert from a friend last summer, it was on sale from 50+$ to 26. :)
Really need sleep and hope, overall. And peace. And, though I'm not really materialistic- a new pointsettia. :) But I don't like how genetically engineered most are in the store. Well, I don't need it, so it's a want. Cool. ? :laugh: But I guess my last one was about 3-4 years old, and I got attached to it blooming almost year round. But it was a real happy connotation, that I could overcome a crappy trigger, so I feel really blessed. :)
It's hard for me to see any progress in myself, or remember progress.
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Lionheart
Not Active
The closer it gets to Thanksgiving day, the sadder I become. I miss my mom, dad, and sister so much that I am in tears as I write this. I am still very grateful and thankful for my blessings, but it is truly difficult to have a holiday in high spirits since they passed. I want to pull my circle of friends closer to me... I guess I am needing a hug.
RVA21
VIP Member
:hug: :hug: :hug: @Lionheart777
RVA21
VIP Member
I'm ok today but to be fair, I was busy and that helped.
Lionheart
Not Active
I am scared. I had heart testing done Friday and the results were abnormal.
Ellabella44
Diamond Member
:hug: hopefully you can still make changes to help.
Somewhat happy because I'm still in possession of myself.
No other phrase for it but f*cked because I'm geting an official secondary diagnosis tomorrow.
I'm worried what the new med will do to me. Side effects, emotionally and all. Will I even feel anything after taking it? Will it be the right one? If it isnt, will I have a holiday hospitalization? Or one further down the road.
I'm scared because there's so much unknown to me on how to deal with this.
I am however proud of myself that I survived this round of it and made the necessary arrangements for help when I felt it was a crisis.
I feel well close to strong though its not the right word. I went through this entire cycle and didn't compromise my sobriety. I'm a recovering alcoholic. Things are what they are. I was pushed to my limits and made it out.
Somewhat happy because I'm still in possession of myself.
No other phrase for it but f*cked because I'm geting an official secondary diagnosis tomorrow.
I'm worried what the new med will do to me. Side effects, emotionally and all. Will I even feel anything after taking it? Will it be the right one? If it isnt, will I have a holiday hospitalization? Or one further down the road.
I'm scared because there's so much unknown to me on how to deal with this.
I am however proud of myself that I survived this round of it and made the necessary arrangements for help when I felt it was a crisis.
I feel well close to strong though its not the right word. I went through this entire cycle and didn't compromise my sobriety. I'm a recovering alcoholic. Things are what they are. I was pushed to my limits and made it out.
:hug: 's @Lionheart777 , and @Ellabella44 :hug::hug:
Very grateful and relieved things went different and much better than I expected last night, and today.
Really really really dreading work tomorrow, (and in general).
Very grateful and relieved things went different and much better than I expected last night, and today.
Really really really dreading work tomorrow, (and in general).
I am also very glad I could split the difference between what I needed to do, wanted to do, and realized what I didn't have to do. Even if one thing I should have done to make my life easier I couldn't manage to do.
Bizarre as it sounds- of all things that could be on my mind- instead for some reason I just feel sad for that little Koala bear Lewis, who's cute little face and burnt nose and cry is in my mind/ heart's eye. I suppose I thought he'd make it, with all that effort. Plus the news said he would. :( :cry: If only it were so easy to grieve my own losses as it is to grieve a little bear on the other side of the world (obviously for more than the little bear, poor people). Supposedly the day he died it finally rained.
I think people would think I'm nuts, to feel badly over a bear. But, well, nuts I am then, I guess.
Bizarre as it sounds- of all things that could be on my mind- instead for some reason I just feel sad for that little Koala bear Lewis, who's cute little face and burnt nose and cry is in my mind/ heart's eye. I suppose I thought he'd make it, with all that effort. Plus the news said he would. :( :cry: If only it were so easy to grieve my own losses as it is to grieve a little bear on the other side of the world (obviously for more than the little bear, poor people). Supposedly the day he died it finally rained.
I think people would think I'm nuts, to feel badly over a bear. But, well, nuts I am then, I guess.
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Lionheart
Not Active
I don't think you are nuts to feel badly over a bear @Tinyflame, they are little souls with feelings and should be treated as such. I think it shows great kindness, compassion, and empathy that you feel bad for the bear. It is sad.
RVA21
VIP Member
Grateful, hopeful, strong :)
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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?
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