RJ, I'm awfully sorry to hear about your pet. Our Maquire was 16. I still miss her horribly and boo like a fool when I think of her big silly puppy face sometimes. Having to acknowledge that loss at the same time as squishing that potentially destructive friendship must have just plain sucked-for lack of any better words. You didn't fool yourself into allowing things to continue, too, which I'm afraid is something I would probably have done. Boundaries are tough because they're so exhausting to establish and maintain, I know.
And so back to the thread. :) Today I'm making a doc appointment for the first time in an awfully long time specifically for something to control the physical effects of this stupid PTSD. I don't really have anger about anything, anytime, which is of course not too normal but this is just annoying the bejeesis out of me. I've been anxious for 3 days running now, with my heart pounding so hard that it's all I hear at night. 20 years out, I can step back and mostly get a good handle on most of this dreck but the anxiety-which-has-no-form defies control.Control/containment has been key to managing things, and yes, I do realize one must also be awfully careful about how much control it is realistic to expect. That is how I'm feeling today.
Somewhere on another thread is an awful lot of good information on how helpful it is to maintain a routine of running. Since the pulse rate is already up it's probably a good idea to go find the running shoes.
Anni
