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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

Happy I drug my hairy yellow butt to the gym. Happy all gifts and groceries are bought. Happy to get back on ly Ts calendar after two months of wasing in a mental quagmire. Happy to be doing art a little bit anyway after months off. Sorry for my liver as there has been to much drinking happening. Hopeful that I can put the underlying, haunting presence of trauma on the back burner.for a few days
 
I feel disappointed and lonely. It's almost 9pm and my parents are dropping my daughter off at a party on their way out. My son exhausted from the big change in his schedule went to bed early. So, I flew my kids in for the holidays to sit alone. Fun. My kids each have 2 weeks off and while my son will be here for the whole time my daughter is only here for a few days. And she's going out to party and drink. Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe I'm just disappointed. Either way it feels pretty shitty.
 
I'm feeling reflective and a little withdrawn. I'm thinking about my daughter. I'm thinking about comments my mom made about one of my triggers on Christmas while we were at a friend's house with a bunch of other people. I'm thinking about comments my dad made about my room and comments he made about me being ready to leave when my mom wants to leave since she's already stressed out. She's worried about the dog's colitis acting up again. It makes me a little angry since I need to consider what I need too. Which is to do laundry.

Maybe my thoughts are distorted. I don't know. I just get aggravated sometimes. I end up feeling like I have to put what I need on the bottom of the list. And it makes me angry when I feel like I'm being asked to put what I need to the side over and over and over and over and over again.
 

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