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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

I'm feeling confused as to why I can't seem to be on a good sleep schedule.
I feel out of sorts.
I'm also feeling stressed about my dentist appointment this week.
I'm feeling down and questioning my self worth. Not too down.
 
I am struggling with pain, cramps, and muscle spasms when I walk. and although I am frustrated about the way doctors will treat you like a drug-seeker if you want to actually control your pain. But be that as it may, I am hopeful because my daughter is supposed to go into detox today.
I am praying and things are slowly starting to look up for me.
 
i'm not sure what to believe, or what to think. Or what I'm supposed to have learned in my life? It's frustrating to get to the back end of it, and have no clue what conclusions to draw or make any sense of it whatsoever.The whole thing feels pointless at best, and harmful at worst, and like I've been operating under one big lie. And I don't know if I believed other's lies, or just lied to myself? Or I assumed too much the best in others, or held myself in a higher regard than I deserved? Idk anymore. What was once solid is now like mist, nebulous.
 
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Worried about 2 friends, but Idk if they are still friends? Never answered request? Am I supposed to ask again, because Idk how that works?

On pins and needles for 3 p.m.

Have to get energy, so much to get done. So I guess exhausted, uneasy, anxious, sad, grateful, confused.
 
Churlish and vindictive.

I’m having to repeat to myself rather a lot that I will NOT bang silverware on metal, and have shouted conversations with the people behind me without even bothering to turn my head, and grind coffee beans a meter from someone’s head all night as they sleep, every 90 min to 3 hours. Like they did to me. Again.

😡
 
Sad because one of my sweet people died, barely spoke English and used to grab my face with her hands covered in soap & give me a big kiss in the bath and tell me she loved me. And say, "You are SWEET , you are a SWEETHEART!!!!" And I'd say, 'YOU ARE TOO!!!!" 😢 I love all her family. Her H decided to call me by my favorite-memoried nickname from the start, and he didn't even know it.
 
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