What Do People Mean By Help?

[physicist13]

When people say "I need help"? Or "ask for help if you need it" (something I would do if I knew how). Or "it's okay to ask for help".
^All of this help related stuff

What do people mean by this? Is everyone just using help as a synonym for therapy? If not, what are the help options?

 

[Naoru]

Help = emotional support. Whether that means a listening ear, a place to crash, advice, referral to someone else, offer of resources, a fun distraction, sitting in silence, simply knowing I am there so they are not alone, ride to the hospital ... many different things, which does sometimes include: "Have you thought about seeking professional support? Therapy has really helped me."

That is what I mean when I offer help, anyway. Depends on the situation.

But many people have difficulty even knowing what they need (including me) or what they are offering.

 

[ladee]

It has been a battle within myself to ask for help. Like @Naoru shared..I didn't know what I needed. So it was hard to ask someone to help me understand why I was even asking for.
But I found it contributed to my search for feeling I was worth someones time.
Or if I was asked if I needed help. That hasn't happened often. I guess I present my self as strong so it really doesn't appear that I am in distress.

Helping is a good thing. And a two way street.

We all need to be told it gets better.

 

[hodge]

I think @Naoru covered all the bases there.

 

[The Albatross]

Assist/Assistance. Not necessarily emotion but also straight real time assistance. Learning how to respond to queries about needing help is a good thing. Even when I don't/won't accept it, it is good to have an offer.

 

[Justmehere]

I'd suggest asking people who say these things what they mean. It can vary widely and it's ok to ask them.

 

[physicist13]

I'd suggest asking people who say these things what they mean. It can vary widely and it's ok to ask...

I have but they tend to respond with another broad answer and rely on me to get specific if I want something... I know this isn't their fault, but I need to know options before I can know/ say what I want/ need

 

[Justmehere]

Ah, ok. That makes more sense.

It seems like you know you are struggling, they know you are struggling, but no one quite knows what to do to help.

Think about it this way. I have a friend with cancer. She didn't know what she needed help with and I wasn't sure how to help. So we both independently began to connect to information online about what helps other cancer sufferers and she also told me about what she was struggling with more. She mentioned she was really tired a lot so I offered to come bring her meals and help with laundry.

In your case, this may be a time to do a lot of research about what helps other sufferers and then when people offer to help, ask if they can do cuz that might help you. It also might help to ask them if they mean "help" in terms of professional help, like counseling, or help in terms of a friend supporting you, listening, etc.

 

[Freedomfighter]

When people say "I need help"? Or "ask for help if you need it" (something I would do if I knew how...

Well, having PTSD places us all into weird situations with fear and anger often overwhelming. I have learned a lot about people. All of the people who have faked caring, who have faked love, who have faked helping me are now the dangerous ones I am running away from.
And I really truly learned about the difference when I saw the exact opposite of these liars. I am impressed and moved.......

Nowadays any fool that comes across my path with the words can I help you? will often be dismissed, empty phrases. Sooooo many people who speak those words really mean: Is there a way you can help me?

Gotta learn the language of the vultures. Way too many fakes out there.