What do you avoid in your daily life? What do you no longer avoid?

[ms spock]

I am struggling to do some job criteria and a covering letter.

 

[lynn T.]

What things do you avoid in daily life?

I avoid having a life. I avoid feeling. I avoid being around people. I avoid a lot of things. I am doing better with this, a lot better with this. I am more here at the moment. I am struggling to get moving though.

What do you avoid in your life?

What do you no longer avoid?

I like your screen name. I am a child of the 50's so maybe should have chosen that moniker! Mostly, I avoid things which I feel are tedious details and cumbersome such as returning telephone calls which ought to last 5 minutes for a business call, etc. and end up lasting 30 minutes or more due to 'talking to a non-human such as computerized telephone programs that never let you get a
hold of a human being. I just made such a call today and it was only to renew health insurance. Got disconnected twice, had to repeat all my info via touching phone buttons and then looked at the clock (utterly exhausted by then) and took a walk to get outside and away from the frustration of one phone call. To me, technology has not made life simpler when it comes to business and telephones. Also, applies to grocery stores and scanners where I often feel like a robot checking out and if the machine fouls up, there's only one guy there and he's helping 10 other people. I suppose I lack patience but often hear others complain of the same things. You ARE indeed alive and just by posting seems to indicate you have not really avoided your life yet altogether. Avoiding is so common so don't beat yourself up too much. It'll change, as it did with me. I still struggle. Have a daughter who presents major issues. Keep Moving OK?

 

[Lionheart]

I avoid alcohol, people who are consuming alcohol, and places that serve alcohol. My father used to be a practicing alcoholic and I grew up with his Jekyll/Hyde personality and his random abuse. I even had a drinking problem in the past when I used alcohol as a coping tool to deal with traumas.

I am not a fanatic about it, I will have the occasional 2 or 3 social drinks from time to time, but I usually do avoid it.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Things I avoid: starting to work on my dream business, even knowing it will take time. Working in a more regular office job(I work from home and even if I go to work outside it's different). Going to gyno or the dentist (unless reeeeeeeaaaaally needed). Rewriting my CV, building a website. Tackling decluttering old notebooks and papers(those I do tackle but in small tasks with time in between). A whole bunch of small practical tasks simply because I feel so overwhelmed currently, that I just don't have the brainspace to deal with anything extra(replacing lightbulbs, getting new glasses...). Going to parties with new people.

Things I no longer avoid: calling for taxi when I need to, answering phonecalls on the home phone, getting on crowded buses, grocery shopping in bigger stores, all other kinds of doctor appointments(other than gyno and dentist).

 

[Kieran]

I avoid having a life. I can very much relate to this. I avoid relationships because I feel like my traumas have tainted me and that everyone else is pure and wouldn't get along with me. Which for the most part is true, I don't get along with many people and dissociation and depression are huge roadblocks for me.

I avoid having a functional life, relationships, most movies and TV shows that have realism to them because they're triggering me and remind me of things I don't think I can ever feel again without getting sucked back into the darkest days of my life.

Eating certain foods, going to certain locations. Smelling certain things (well, as much as anyone can avoid smelling something!).

 

[Druidcat]

I avoid children, cars, phones. Crowds scare the crap out of me. The problem is that my avoidance has led to my inlaws thinking I must hate them or something, because I never go to family functions, because there are children there. :( My avoidance of phones has led to me be fired from a job.

 

[ms spock]

I don't avoid having a job or being out in the world.

 

[ms spock]

I no longer avoid having a life!

 

[ms spock]

There are so many things that I am not avoiding anymore. I am doing really well! I am doing really well!

I did not avoid so many things right yesterday! I managed time. I managed stressed. I managed working through everything. I did brilliantly yesterday!

I didn't avoid teaching. I managed the class really well. I talked to all the kids. I talked to all the parents.

I didn't avoid my feelings yesterday! Half way through the class that I realised that I wasn't being self conscious or socially anxious or anything!

My lesson preparation was totally superb, even if I don't say so myself. I made these cutest representations of the most complex concept and turned it into a game! The kids loved it! And they got the complex concept absolutely nailed!

 

[mamachick]

I avoid control of things, which essentially means I avoid the life I once had. Its very concerning to me because in many ways it is not for the better. I use to be an extrovert and on the go all the time. If I had time, I liked to shop. Now I avoid people for the most part and dread shopping (do as much on line as I can) I use to pride myself in a clean house...which I have given up on. I use to do home improvements and avoid that. I avoid spending money in most areas. I avoid sex. I avoid exercise and use to walk a few miles daily. I use to not leave the house in the morning until it was straightened, beds made, etc. Now I never make my bed and avoid leaving the house. I avoid dressing well. I avoid reading which I did before ptsd. I just opened 2 years of mail recently. I avoid making phone calls. I know that I sound like a depressed person but don't feel depressed.Somehow in my mind, much of this seems like a letting go of control and acceptance of where I am. Other parts feel negligent. However, I do realize I have little of a life. I sleep a lot, play games on the computer, play with my dog, and watch tv. I cook a little and eat decently. I use to forget to eat because I was too busy. I won't buy groceries until my husband says we need to go together. I was always big on time management and would never have done these things before, now I feel like a child just being lazy.

The very things that a therapist would tell me to do, I avoid. I know its unhealthy. I am physically much less healthy. I avoid medical appointments or eye exams thought I realize that I need them.I am a different person and in my trying to accept this, I avoid almost everything that I once was. I spent the weekend cleaning and organizing and thought it might be a first step. I think my avoidance came when I had so much to do that it became overwhelming and I went to bed. So I have a goal of getting my house in order and also ....considering joining a gym. ( I can no longer walk distances but could do weight training).

 

[Lionheart]

I now avoid cigarette smoke like the plague since I am quitting the habit. I also avoid being seen nude due to extreme self-consciousness and fear of ridicule.

 

[ms spock]

Right at the moment ...read for the past several months, nearing a year if I’m brutally honest... connection.

It's a hard one.