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What Do You Do On Those Days...

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 27340
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...where you're so low nothing, nothing at all, seems interesting to do? There's an end to how long you can make time go by playing SimCity on your phone and watching the first 30 seconds of probably a hundred YouTube videos...
 
I get up and move around - even though it will be (on a certain level) mindless, I can try and focus on the things I see around me, and the light exercise will at least make it easier to sleep, come nighttime.
 
Honestly... For me, boredom is a good sign I'm coming out of a depression. It feels worse. It feels like I've just sunk even lower... But when I'm bad off I can stare at a wall for hours. Perfectly content. Can play a stupid game, and be caught up in it. (I also play fun games, this is different)

Once nothing holds my attention? <grin> That's really, really good news. My brain is starting to turn back on, and I'm going to be coming off of 'autopilot' soon.

I can do 2 different things, and they're both equally successful:

- Something brainless
- Something enervating

Brainless is to both fuel the boredom, and not upset the process. I want to be bored. Because I cannot stand boredom, and it's hugely motivating. So I either go to sleep, or go to the gym and do receptive motion exercise. Don't even have to think about where I'm putting my feet.

Enervating happens when the boredom has gotten too much to bear. So I seriously jack my brain into something for it to work on, or my body into something I have to pay a great deal of attention to do "right" (adrenaline junkie stuff: surfing, snowboarding, climbing, etc.). I won't usually enjoy it, not yet, but I can start to feel systems clicking over and turning on. It generally takes me a few weeks of doing electrifying, charging, exciting things... Before I feel the happy that goes along with it.

It takes me awhile to "wake up" out of a funk. Out of a depression. But boredom is the alarm clock that tells me I'm going to be waking up, soon.
 
It depends on the details of what being that low means for you. @FridayJones experiences being that low as boredom, and boredom as a good sign, while @joeylittle recognizes that exercise helps. For me, there are several shades and nuances of depression, and I can't treat all of them the same. When I am in the state I think you are describing, what's under it for me is anger. I can't stick with doing any one thing because my self loathing is so close to the surface that the slightest hint of frustration makes it boil over. So that's three very different responses, but none of them answer what's going on for you.

When you are feeling that low, what exactly is underneath that? See if you can get in touch with it. Grief? Loneliness? Hopelessness? There's no one right or wrong answer, it's about paying attention to what's present for you. Then, can you find a safe outlet for it? I think you are artistic if I remember correctly. Can you put the feeling onto paper? It doesn't have to be a masterpiece, it's about process not product. Or beat up a pillow. Whatever works to get the feeling out without hurting yourself.
 
@sun seeker has a point. It's different for different people and it depends on what is causing the feeling. But sometimes I have no clue what is causing my feelings, ESPECIALLY that restless/depression/boredom feeling. I could spend hours and hours trying to figure it out and come up empty. And I've experienced both forms of such a feeling already described, plus more. I get that way a lot actually, when I'm sad or frustrated or lonely or angry or... who knows what else. I have also been so depressed I was not bored even while staring at a wall for most of the day every day for months and months, and when I finally got bored it was a good sign. The solution may or may not be about finding the cause. If you can, by all means do so, but if you can't... that's ok too.

Personally, I try not to fight it too much. I find it really difficult to force myself to get exercise or do anything that requires a lot of effort. I usually try to find stuff to do that will make me feel like I'm accomplishing something. I clean my room, balance my checkbook, run some errands if I need to get out of the house, or something like that. I try to pick short tasks so I am less likely to get fed up in the middle of them. They are also easier to get the motivation to do. For some reason feeling like I'm getting something done helps. The satisfaction lifts my mood a bit and having something to do makes the time pass.
 
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