What Do Your Memories Look Like?

[Ronin]

Usually a fragmented mess, even the non-traumatic ones.

The traumatic ones just hurt a specific way.

And a lot of thought-image-feeling memories for things I'm usually repressing. Very dreamlike, those ones.

 

[.Bubbles.]

Like snapshots or mini parts of a movie. They are kind of "distant" if that makes sense. Dark. The same parts on loop sometimes.

 

[KwanYingirl]

My memories are stored and intrude in several ways. I've had a lifetime of trauma beginning at age 4. So child sexual abuse is in snapshots from 3rd person perspective, quite often and alter several girls and one boy who would sit outside the door and wait. Adolescent sexual abuse is a movie running across my line of sight with much emotion, fear the preeminent one. Childhood physical abuse I was in my body and remember every hit. In my 20's traveling in Europe ( running away from America and my past) I was drugged and kidnapped by a guy I met at a pub on my birthday. I was passed out but woke in the car. Played dead with my right eye open. I played dead real good . The first traffic light that was red, I got out of my door and ran as fast as I could. Someone helped me get a taxi to take me back to my flat. I remember that I transcended the effects of the drug enough so that I could escape. In Italy I was chased down by a carful of drunks but got away into the woods.i see that in 1st person as I also remember being attacked in Greece. I got away from him.
Was strangled from behind by what turned out tobe an ex con looking for narcotics in the clinic I worked at. I was in his way. I passed out and remember it in first person.
Severely abusive love affair wherein I was beaten strangled and threatened with death on a fairly daily basis. I was fully present except being strangled. I would dissociate.

Nightmares are usually me in a car or airplane being overtaken by tidal waves. Those are the ones I recall. I often wake up in another room that i have no memory of migrating.

Fun with Dick and Jane. TheAmerican dream. f*ck it.

 

[Ocean5]

@KwanYingirl Wow! I'm at a lost for words. Glad you are here.