What To Never Say To A Ptsd Sufferer

[Sues]

Wow, now that just seriously freaked me out. So, now I'm thinking that too much validation can be really hard too.

Yeah, I agree with you Shellbell. It's more than just trying to empathize with you, it's like they are putting you down for having had something bad happen to you.

I've had so many people say to me, "he didn't hit you, so it's no big deal." I felt like saying, "oh, thanks, I hadn't realized that. I feel soooo much better now. All fixed."

Don't assume you know what someone went through or how bad it is. They say there are worse things than dying. Well, there are worse things than you can imagine. And they happen to people every day.

 

[Springer80]

There was a guy I used to work with who loved horror movies and he used to creep up behind people whlst they sat, as quiet as a cat and put his hands round your neck.

He was lovely in a Boris Karloff sort of way but christ :eek: he made me jump sometimes. I never hit him but my reflex jumped like anything.

 

[Sues]

OMG Springer. If he did that to me, I would freak out!

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I would probably make a scene and tell him very loudly to back off. I would avoid him after that. Some people are so scary.

 

[Privateer]

I don't mind people doing that sort of thing to me in theory, by which I mean I see that it's done in good humour and don't object to the intent behind it.

However...I have had to warn people who are that way inclined not to do it because my first reaction on being surprised is usually to punch the hell out of whatever surprised me before I've even had a chance to register what it is.

Which can lead to awkward situations, as you can imagine...

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Don't tell me to not hold the actions of others against you.

No, I shouldn't fear women, BUT I DO! (Alcoholic/abusive mother, female molester.)

No, I shouldn't believe that I'm worthless to guys unless I'm hot, BUT I DO! (I got no attention whatsoever until I lost weight, and when I did, it was cuz of my "assets" ahem.)

(smack, smack, smack) I don't have the memory of a goldfish. Next time you give me this BS I'm turning it around on you.

 

[Tanishq]

Next time you give me this BS I'm turning it around on you.

Does it sound like you rebellion? I do this still. If someone gives me so much negativity and tries to mess with my mind. I would turn it up all on them. It leaves bad taste in my mouth. I feel bad later that I turned it all up on them and it may have made them feel bad. :confused:

 

[Tanishq]

he used to creep up behind people whlst they sat, as quiet as a cat and put his hands round your neck.

When I was kid, I slapped a guy so hard for doing this to me. He didn't speak to me for a week and never did such activity to me again. I can't stand to such activity of freaking me out of blue and have fun.

Still, I would get angry and first I would make an explanation not to do it again. I am an adult now, but if it is recurring I would take some action against them.

Sorry you had to go through that guy. :hug:

 

[Tanishq]

Quit acting, I don't believe you.

I have confronted this kind of people many times. I have come to know that it is their difficulty not to believe in themselves in themselves enough. So they tend to put themselves on some higher pedestal after gaining some knowledge and they think they own some mastery.

It's very harsh when someone else does this. Most PTSD sufferers are believer in themselves and they want to regain their strength, work in this world. It can make them feel bad much.

Couple of weeks ago someone accused me of making excuses, I felt very bad.

 

[Britt.f7]

Jaret, thank you for your kind words. I hope you no longer feel bad over what they said. Obviously they don't understand. Reasons are definitely not excuses.

 

[Pencil]

Therapist no 1: (in the middle of a panic attack due to flashbacks, flooding, the works, and falling down a deep well, which eventually lead to the complex trauma diagnosis by T 2) I sent her a text saying weird things were happening. Her response: 'Dear P, keep breathing, see you Thursday.' (This was Friday).

T 1: On me not being able to actually mourn the death of my sister two weeks earlier: 'Why can't you go through the grieving process? No-one has ever died of feeling.' (Ignoring the fact that I had told her about the rumour that my sister was actually my biological mother, and that I had to get a copy of my birth certificate first in order to know WHO I was mourning - my sister or my mother.)

No wonder I fired her.

 

[Britt.f7]

Pencil, I hope you have found or will find someone more responsive. Okay, she responded, but someone who is better at it and shows more compassion. You deserve it!