Which Cultural Virtue/Gold Ring Has PTSD Reversed For You?

[Weemie]

That I have to be productive and be employed in order to have value in our society.

 

[Starfish]

I definitely fit in here. As I stumble through daily breathing/living, the next necessary thing, the next WTF thought, the next I Do give a hoot thought..... the main thought that makes any sense on any given day is the reality and truth that I am a person with CPTSD. Without all the info available I would no longer be here.

 

[arfie]

most excellent question, friday. it's been a high-fiber chew for me since you posted it yesterday. i have composed dozens of witty responses which didn't quite hold water when i thought a bit deeper. each response attempt has led me to deeper contemplation of a condition i call, "contrarianism." contrarianism is where i will disagree with myself in order to win an argument and/or be the fully unique, superstar human i wish i was. i come by this condition honestly. my highly dysfunctional birth family took great pride in being the exception to every rule and the rule for every exception.

dunno what i'm reaching for here. maybe that i need to quit measuring myself in cultural virtues?

 

[siliverlinings]

The belief that you care for your parents as they age no matter what. Not if they haven't earned my care. It drives me nuts how often that one crops up. Mine may not be around any more but I'm not going to be made to feel guilty about my choice.

I think there's something about the way I view honesty that's PTSD related. People find me uncomfortably blunt at times, but I can't bear those who try to soften things or prevaricate to make people feel better.

I can relate. I was just told yesterday that I am a truth teller. I am very blunt. But I have learned that people really do not want to truth. That is very hard for me. I had no idea this could be ptsd related. Thank you for posting.

 

[OliveJewel]

Definitely the living in the moment thing—that’s a recipe for dissociation for me.

Not sure if anyone mentioned this yet but I know I’m not alone in having to learn how to develop dependence on others.

Along the same line as not having to always think about others’ reactions first: learning that not wanting to disappoint anyone ever and fawning are in themselves manipulative and keep me in chaotic dynamics.

“Don’t air dirty laundry” was a damaging concept for me as I thought I needed to protect others from the dirt wafting from my person.

I’m sure there’s more.

 

[Tinyflame]

Absolutely could not envision a future. Also prefer the truth, it takes away the unknown and my mind's thoughts. Also I do not know how to relax, not just physically but more so mentally. I am too aware of what is around me and most all others seem painfully unaware and prefer it that way.

I think much of Western society at least encourages wealth and prestige. 24/7 work, and distraction, and kind of disposable, whereas I prefer peace and low-key. Most things also require putting a best foot forward, and I feel it often prevents people from actually being authentic. I just don't have the energy to not be authentic, but I don't think it's encouraged.

Funny though, although I have not really developed a personal sense of worth, I see way more worth in others I think than without having ptsd. Or I just think differently, about what I'm thinking of and how I'm thinking of it. I would say I appear to have a very ordinary life, but I think looking back many of my experiences and what followed and the twists and turns in life have been extraordinary. But it also has been very difficult, and it's not something that can be bought or preplanned or contrived, so that is opposite of what is encouraged and marketed.

 

[OliveJewel]

Believing that everyone is capable of or basically good. Believing that everyone has the potential to change their heart or their motives. Believing that everyone should be nice and humble all the time.