I gotta ask for some opinions! This is driving me crazy! I know what my T thinks but I am having such hard time believing this. Long story short, my dads best friend growing up was a pediphile. Which I always wondered why? This best friend had a son who was 15, I was 5 and he raped me. That is bad enough I know. My parents never protected me from all of this. I was not scared or understood rape until about a year later. I was locked upstairs as my mom did reguraly to me. What I just recently remembered was finding a photo album. Needless to say I figured out what had happened to me by looking at album. I don't remember pics that we'll just that i understood the horrible reality of my rape.T says parents probably took photos and were into this kind of thing. Also parents were investigated when I was in high school for some type of Internet crime. So my question is.. I am just in denial that this is what it sounds like? Or could this new memory just be something more innocent...really can't believe my parents did this. Even though they subjected me to multiple other abuses.
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Childhood Kinda In Denial... Does This Memory Mean What I Think?
- Post starter Lee2001
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Justmehere
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Do I understand correctly that you found some photo albums of a 15 year old raping you when you were 5 and you wonder what that means about your parents?
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- #3
Justmehere
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If your parents possess pictures of child porn and/or child sexual assault (which includes inappropriate touching), and then they are guilty of a very serious felony even if they didn't take the pictures. A conviction for possession of child porn often comes with at least a 5 year mandatory prison sentence. Often they will charge 1 count for each image a person has.
If by "some type of inappropriate acts" you mean sex acts, i'd say yes, yes it does mean what you think. Especially if your parents were investigated for "some type of Internet crime." If you go back and read what you wrote, even the way you wrote it seems to imply that you're not quite ready to face the reality -- you use vague phrases to describe the most horrendous things here, as if your subconscious is trying to cushion it all or dilute it to soften the blow. To be honest, if your parents knew you were raped and didn't do anything, to me that's enough to make them awful. And if your dad's best friend was a pedophile, I feel like that says something about him ... (no offense) In my opinion, it sounds like your T is on the right track, and you will just need a lot of time to process this. Don't push yourself, be kind to yourself. Let it all come to the surface whenever it wants to and don't force it.
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- #6
Yes I know it's serious. I struggle on how reliable my memory is. If I knew for sure I would report. That is what makes this hard.
Justmehere
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It's normal to have robust denial about things that parents do. Kids need parents to be people they can depend on for survival. I'm sorry that your parents were so awful. It makes sense to struggle with believing that this could be true. :hug:
You could contact law enforcement and tell them this is what you recall. It is true that you recall this. Then let them investigate and figure it out from there. It seems like your parents were already under investigation anyhow. It's almost impossible to convict someone based on a singular childhood memory alone, but they might be able to investigate, and if they find or already have evidence confirming the concerns, then they can take more action.
I would trust your sense on this. It is probably what it seems.
Reporting is a complicated thing - it might be worthwhile discussing the possibility of reporting with a victim advocate with the police, or an even more confidential option is to contact the rape crisis center in your area and see if they have someone you can talk with about the pros and cons of reporting. RAINN is an organization that provides info on how to reach various local organizations and they have a hotline to discuss issues like this with them too.
You could contact law enforcement and tell them this is what you recall. It is true that you recall this. Then let them investigate and figure it out from there. It seems like your parents were already under investigation anyhow. It's almost impossible to convict someone based on a singular childhood memory alone, but they might be able to investigate, and if they find or already have evidence confirming the concerns, then they can take more action.
I would trust your sense on this. It is probably what it seems.
Reporting is a complicated thing - it might be worthwhile discussing the possibility of reporting with a victim advocate with the police, or an even more confidential option is to contact the rape crisis center in your area and see if they have someone you can talk with about the pros and cons of reporting. RAINN is an organization that provides info on how to reach various local organizations and they have a hotline to discuss issues like this with them too.
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Thank you for responding. That is what I was wondering exactly.... How it all sounded and what it probably means. I appreciate you being honest and for your input. Kinda what I was afraid of but do need to know. I will take my time with this!! Very good advice to be kind to self.
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