Desire To Know Abusers Criminal History. Just Me?

[mytai]

Ever since my therapist had a police friend of hers look into my abuser (criminal history) I've had a huge desire to know his previous charges, time he served, why he served time. Does anyone else feel this way, or just me?

Also, does anyone know how I would go about getting this information in Ontario (Canada)? I've attempted to do some research on the internet and still have no idea if this is possible or even how to go about it.

 

[scout86]

I know there's no criminal history to look in to in my case but, if there was? Yeah, I think I'd want to know. Both before AND after.

Not at all sure how you'd go about checking this out in Canada. In the US, there are ways to do criminal background checks online. Many states have sites you can go to to get information on a person's criminal record for for free.

 

[mytai]

Yeah that's the benefit of the system in the US, that information is available. Heck, I would even pay for it if it gave me the information I was looking for. Unfortunately Canada believes in privacy, even of those who have committed crimes like this and I can't just search for it online.

 

[scout86]

What do they do in Canada with people applying for jobs, etc? Here, pretty much anyone who's going to work with kids. even as a volunteer, undergoes a background check. I wonder if they do the same thing there and, if so, how it's done.

 

[mytai]

If you volunteer or your employer requires a background check there are two levels of it. A regular one, and one from the Vulnerable Sector (required for working with kids, elderly, and disabilities), but you have to go into the police station to request one on yourself.

 

[mytai]

You can't request a background check on someone else without their signed consent.

 

[Justmehere]

Yes. I have done this. It was a very mixed thing for me. I found out much more than I expected and it was validating that he really was a horrible person, but it was also frightening and stirred up more symptoms for awhile. It was also frustrating because he was released and committed more crimes against others.

If your therapist or her police friend has already look up the info, maybe you could ask them? They might be bound by privacy laws. If your abuser went to jail for anything related to you, then perhaps you could ask the prosecuting attorney? another option is to find a victim rights/advocacy agency and they might be able to advise you. Or you could contact an attorney and see if they would tell you how for free on the phone.

 

[scout86]

That's going to make it pretty difficult! Does anything come up with a search on the person's name? Things like newspaper articles might.

 

[mytai]

No, I've tried that scout. From the little information I do have, the crimes he was convicted of several times occurred before they posted this information. And also because it was all children, they often won't publish the offenders name (at least in my province) because of the victims privacy and potentially being connected by the offenders name.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I know there's no criminal history to look in to in my case but, if there was? Yeah, I think I'd want to know. Both before AND after.

Me too, on both accounts. Actually, I only know there isnt a criminal history for my step father (aka cult leader) because i searched! :whistling:

I also know, because my therapist recently googled (my search was years ago) that a google search on my mom & step dad's full names came up "[their names], leader of the CHILDREN'S ministry of [some church]" and i tossed and turned forever over that. "What if they started it back up?" "What if i told someone what was happening?" "What if someone else got hurt and it was because i didnt tell"...what if what if what if. I grew up in a cult thus had many many MANY things to show has evidence. Actually, though they had a bon fire, i doubt they dug up the yard so i sort of still do. But its the what ifs that made me realize that googling them, searching for their past crimes (most especially after the time they abused you) can lead to these forever ongoing and non-ending what if questions and self blaming questions. If you did tell someone, find a crime during the timeframe you were abused and you have "what if i told sooner?".

Have I? Yes. Should you leave well enough alone? Id say most likely. But thats just my opinion. I think its leaving yourself open for self blaming. But my therapist is also the one that googled...i thought it was due to my past sounding like some Steven King book. But maybe its good for you to do so. This is just my experience of it.

ETA: I still have a desire to know, i just know looking opens me up and i think it was part of ways that my therapist was showing me that he would of done this, with or without me and my mom...so i suppose it was a way to work that out on my head

 

[EveHarrington]

I think it's important to check your reasons for wanting to look up their criminal record.

To give you piece of mind?

Yes/no-------absence of a criminal record isn't proof they've done nothing else wrong whereas a criminal record is more likely to show they broke the law (barring false confession, wrongful conviction).

To keep tabs on them?

What would be the purpose of keeping tabs on them?

I personally want to know nothing about those who hurt me. They've stollen enough of my life so I refuse to give them any more of it.

Could finding criminal records throw you into a tailspin?

-----Guilt because you didn't do enough to stop them?
-----Increased shame?

I guess I don't see the point in looking up criminal records, but maybe that's just me. I much rather focus on my own healing and moving forward/away from them.

 

[mytai]

@EveHarrington I guess more to know the years of the convictions and the time he served. I know who he is, he's a family member, I know what he's done. It's more so for validation and also to piece things together for me. I know he was convicted after my abuse began, but also before family cut ties with him... I want to know how long. How frequently he was convicted. I already know the basics, I know he served time. I want to know how long and what type of sentence he served (weekend sentence, which was common at the time and for the area).