Does Anyone Else Mask Their Anxiety?

[Rumors]

I don't show any of the 'common' signs of anxiety. I was once (before being told I have PTSD) diagnosed...

I get ulcers all throughout my digestive tract. It's awful. I also get shingles. I know that is when I have been stuffing it too long.
I always stuff it though. I can feel like I am about to drop dead from a heart attack and I will smile and say nothing. WTH? Why would I do that? I wonder if it is some form of control for me to at least be able to put up a front. Then, when I get so sick I have to go to the doctor, I suffer for months with ulcers and can't eat much bc of the pain. It sucks. Big time.
When my anxiety is at its worst, I literally feel my heart pounding so hard it makes me wonder if my chest will explode. I can't breathe well, my memory even slips. Lordy.

 

[Tinyflame]

That's my experience of anxiety also @Rumors . I'd probably call it 'abject terror'.

Oye. :( :hug:

 

[SoSadGuilty]

I get ulcers all throughout my digestive tract. It's awful. I also get shingles. I know that is when I h...

That is awful, I can't believe how sick you get you poor thing. Do you also get the racing mind, ruminating and fear of failure on top of all that?

 

[SoSadGuilty]

That's my experience of anxiety also @Rumors . I'd probably call it 'abject terror'....

Do you feel like that a lot? I have reduced the feeling somewhat over the last few weeks but going back to work next week has the knots back in my stomach today. I'm worried I won't cope or that I won't be able to do my job.

 

[Friday]

An exceptionally small number of people have ever seen me lose control enough to see what I'm feeling if I don't want them to.

 

[SoSadGuilty]

An exceptionally small number of people have ever seen me lose control enough to see what I'm feeli...

I'm unable to hide my feelings I'm afraid. I cry very easily and have spent most of this year so far crying at inopportune moments.

 

[Rumors]

That is awful, I can't believe how sick you get you poor thing. Do you also get the racing mind, ru...

Yes I have the racing mind and such. Crazy. I worry a lot too about things that will probably never happen. Ruminate, obsess, and all those really fun things....
I try not to share it much though. Too scary!

 

[SoSadGuilty]

Yes I have the racing mind and such. Crazy. I worry a lot too about things that will probably never happ...

I'm the queen of catastrophising

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes terrible ulcers, shakes, not crying. Think I hide it but not as well as I hide depression/ despair. Beyond knots in the stomach= throwing up, pain. Not generalized but more like focused on what there is to worry about (involuntarily). Now sometimes I feel like fainting-(?)

Abject terror? More often thn not. It turns in to it quickly. A function of feeling like no resources too, maybe, worst case scenario possible/ coming (because it often has?) -? :(

How did you reduce it @SoSadGuilty ? (I am part Irish too btw). :hug:

Better dy to you, & @Rumors , etc :hug:

 

[SoSadGuilty]

Yes terrible ulcers, shakes, not crying. Think I hide it but not as well as I hide depression/ despair....

Oh @Junebug I struggle so, particularly bad at the moment. I have no wise words, I'm just weary from the sense of impending doom.

 

[Tinyflame]

If able, think for one moment, how relief/ peace/ no worries feels. (Without 'thoughts'.)

Xox :hug:

 

[SoSadGuilty]

If able, think for one moment, how relief/ peace/ no worries feels. (Without 'thoughts'.)

Xox :h...

I long for peace, for a mind that isn't always focused on the worst case scenario. Apologies to the OP for hijacking your thread