What Exactly Is A Crisis?

[sun seeker]

There is another thread on how to know when you are in crisis. My question is different. When I'm in crisis, I know. But I'm not sure how to define it for anyone else. Someone asked me a very reasonable question today: when I say I am in crisis, what do I mean? And what can others do that helps me? I'm surprised at how hard it is to put it into words. I think of recent crises and what has been happening, and still can't find words.

There will be different answers here, no doubt. I'm curious. What constitutes a crisis for you? And once you are there, what helps you get out of it?

 

[lostforgottensoul]

What constitutes a crisis for you? And once you are there, what helps you get out of it?

For me, I think its way further than most or my entire life would be mostly crisis. For me its when im on the edge figuring out what i have that can successfully kill me. I jump directly there so though i know im there, i cant seem to reach out before hand or while im getting there as getting there is a huge jump. Also when im cutting/punishment and i have reached out before i cut/punished once as the urge is there before i do, but only did one time. So my two "crisis" is on the edge suicidal and a strong urge to cut/punish

When im there, i cant speak. If i called a crisis line, they wouldnt even hear a hello from me. I can type but not speak. Typing depends on if i can find words for it. I used to draw/paint it away but i lost that. Id say i can mostly type it out most of the time. At least in a conversation i can usually work out the words. So thats how i get out of it. Typing a conversation about it with someone/people that get it and are supportive.

Did that answer it?

 

[Justmehere]

How I define a crisis: when I am not sure I am able to keep myself from harm, and the risk or threat of harm is imminent and immediate.

How my therapist defines something as being enough to reach out to her for crisis support: three steps before I end up in the above situation.

 

[joeylittle]

When I can't dial back my despair.

For me, that's a physical thing. One way it manifests is that I'll be unable to stop or interrupt sobbing. Another way, is I am unable to move my mind off the belief that I'm already dead. There's a physical sensation with that one too, it's just I'm not good at describing it. The next step with both of those is a resolve to kill myself, and I'm grateful that I really buy into my safety contract with my therapist.

The 'other' kind of crisis for me has to do with believing I'm someplace other than I am. This is most common if I wake up from a nightmare, or have sleep paralysis, or wake up from sleepwalking. Those are less frequent but I'm capable of hurting myself during them and I try and get intervention for those, too.

 

[Deleted member 541]

Crisis for me is being triggered from one of my biggest triggers. I have many that I deal with, but the major ones send me spiraling into a deep deep depression and then the suicide ideation becomes a plan. I can't eat, sleep, and all I do it plan my escape. I feel totally out of control and my only focus becomes suicide.

 

[Tinyflame]

I suppose I relate mostly to @She Cat , but I find it hrad to recognize a crisis for myself, though I see it for others & that in a (big) way is a crisis for me, when others are in one. But not sure if my own is, because it feels so-final. So I suppose long-story-short what harms others due to myself or not I can recognize as a crisis, my self, not so much.

What helps is talking, help, different perspective, recognizing triggers, less pain & more sleep, problems that are solved, support, kindness (not abuse), soft environments.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

The 'other' kind of crisis for me has to do with believing I'm someplace other than I am. This is most common if I wake up from a nightmare, or have sleep paralysis, or wake up from sleepwalking. Those are less frequent but I'm capable of hurting myself during them and I try and get intervention for those, too.

Oh, I do that often. At least often dont know where im at and think the nightmare was real for about 5 or so mins. I sleep walk about once a week or more. Night terrors as often. I never thought of it as crisis as its so often. A bit less often with the cloniditon in my pain pump and seirqueol XR. But often enough.

 

[sun seeker]

Did that answer it?

Yes, thanks! So to summarize, suicidal, self harming, and unable to speak. Does that cover it pretty well?

when I am not sure I am able to keep myself from harm, and the risk or threat of harm is imminent and immediate

So again, suicidal and/or self harming? I don't want to put words in your mouth, and not sure what you or your therapist would call harm.

three steps before I end up in the above situation.

Does that work for you? Do you know when that point is?

I'm curious because a crisis, for me, comes on so suddenly that there wouldn't be three steps before I get there. There are triggers that take me to a state that I could consider three steps before crisis, but being there doesn't mean I am headed for a crisis. I usually wouldn't reach out for help when there, because this happens on an almost daily basis. But when something triggers me so badly that I am in crisis, there is very little warning.

I think. Will have to think on that some more.

One way it manifests is that I'll be unable to stop or interrupt sobbing. Another way, is I am unable to move my mind off the belief that I'm already dead. There's a physical sensation with that one too, it's just I'm not good at describing it. The next step with both of those is a resolve to kill myself

Sounds like you have thought out the specifics really well. I think it's good to focus on the physical sensations that clue you in. So with this state, is the problem that you aren't able to get yourself back without help? You have really good coping skills, so it sounds like "crisis" is something that exceeds your coping skills. Does that sound right?

I feel totally out of control and my only focus becomes suicide.

Seriously suicidal when triggered by one of your major triggers. Got it. Are you able to ask for help from there? Does whoever you ask for help from know ahead of time what helps?

that in a (big) way is a crisis for me, when others are in one

Seeing others in danger. I can relate to that one! I spend a lot of energy trying to be sure that others I feel responsible for (and I feel responsible for a lot of people) are not in danger.

But not sure if my own is, because it feels so-final.

Just trying to get clear on this. Is it hard to ask for help when you yourself are in crisis, because it feels like nothing could help? Is that what you mean by it feeling final?

 

[sun seeker]

@lostforgottensoul, I could relate to what you said about not asking for help when you are in what most people would consider a crisis, because most of your life would then be a crisis. I've noticed the same thing about myself. I put up with stress that most people would not tolerate, just because I'm used to it and/or don't think anyone can help, anyway. Definitely true when compared with the general population. Compared to others with PTSD, hard to tell. We cover quite a range.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

So to summarize, suicidal, self harming, and unable to speak. Does that cover it pretty well?

I woyld say so other than the one I added, the 'dont know where i am' with nightmares, sleep walking, night terrors thiugh it happens so often and im ok once i "snap out of it" im not sure it would classify as crisis.

a crisis, for me, comes on so suddenly that there wouldn't be three steps before I get there.

It does for me too, im ok one sec and trying to kill myself the next. The urge to cut gives me that time but suicide doesnt. Ive tried to do the 3 step thing and it has worked and hasnt worked but its good to do, all 3 of these steps before you off yourself and until you do all 3 you dont...that has worked.

ETA: I dont remember the 3 steps. @Justmehere posted them on one of my threads and they worked.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

because most of your life would then be a crisis.

Yeah, my brain sort of stays in crisis mode. Theres no relax mode, off switch, or calming down. I have worst days and then way worse days...the way worse would be what id call crisis but i do things in my "normal mode" that most would consider a crisis and its just another day for me.

 

[sun seeker]

i do things in my "normal mode" that most would consider a crisis

Just working on defining my own crisis state here. I am triggered by either events or thoughts that activate my major triggers, often many times a day, but keep functioning and either find a way to reassure myself or just wait for it to pass. The state of fear I am in when triggered is definitely not par for the course for most people, but I can't ask for help every time or I'd be asking for help all the time.

A crisis is when I am so flooded that the rest of my life is on hold because I am in such enormous emotional pain that my sole focus becomes making it stop. That would be a good definition for me, I think. Emotional pain so great that I can focus on nothing but making it stop.