Why Did The Abusive Ex...

[EveHarrington]

There was a DJ on the radio the other day that said he held the door for a woman and she got mad.

Exactly.

I hold the door for people all the time. Men. Women. Children.

Yet I know I won't ever get yelled at for being sexist ----because I'm a woman.

I bet that same woman the DJ met would also bitch if the guy let the door slam in her face.

I also bet that woman will complain that there are no good guys left in the world. Well no wonder when there are women like her who get nasty when men are nice/courteous/respectful!

 

[Ronin]

Maybe what reads as help reads as power & threat & degradation to another?

Not all 'help' is help.

And frankly it's pretty misogynist to trash how other women deal with their lives.

 

[EveHarrington]

Maybe what reads as help reads as power & threat & degradation to another?

Not all 'help' is help.

And f...

But if you're truly afraid of a man(person!) holding a door for you, then I must say that you're the one with issues. The rest of the world shouldn't start being rude 24/7 because niceties offend you. And, if you are offended by people being nice, learn to zip it instead of biting people's heads off.

 

[Casey_03]

I don't know. I've had men hold the door for me purely out of courtesy, which I appreciate. But I've also had men hold the door for me only to get all creepy and start hitting on me and trying to pick me up. One's polite, the other I find insulting and sleazy. I would say I am offended in any situation like this when the man expects me to "return the favor" afterward. Likewise to random compliments on the street. It's nice when a man gives me a compliment just to give me a compliment, because he really likes my smile or whatever. But when he follows that up with, "Give me your number" I find it creepy.

I also once had a male doctor refuse to explain my own condition to me in an emergency room. He insisted on telling only my boyfriend. And yet it was MY condition. That was screwed up. I tore him a new one for that.

 

[EveHarrington]

This sounds all too familiar to me.

It's about power play. I know how personal it feels, but he's not...

It hurts to be a secret. :hugs:

 

[Gs172003]

Here it's politeness. It's the way things are here. Kids do it. Women do it men do it. We will think there is something wrong with you if you get offended. Nobody can be expected to know every danged rule of every person on the planet. It's impossible. But like I said, when in Rome.

 

[Fadeaway]

I live in one of the most misogynist cities in the U.S. due to religion. It is a crazy time warp here. Women obey their husbands is the law of the land. I too have had Dr.s who would only explain things to my husband. I even had one call my husband in from the waiting room. Personally, it felt like a huge violation of my privacy. I am not going to keep secrets from my husband, but i still have to right to decide whether to tell him things or not.

Every time my husband and I go out we get stares because we break so many taboos. Yes, I have told my husband that we can't afford something he wants in public. I deal with finances and household budget due to a mutual agreement. We have had men come up to us and make snide remarks because of it.

At the same time, these same men would never behave in certain offensive ways, such as telling off-color jokes and will be the first to give up their seat to me. There are things women aren't expected to have to do and men will step in and help.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

But I've also had men hold the door for me only to get all creepy and start hitting on me and trying to pick me up.

Me too. It got so bad that when a man tries to hold a door for me i pretend I forgot something in my car or whatever and then go after him or more i will speed or slow my walk to go in before a guy or after.

Its just a thing. I wont be rude to a man holding the door but i try to avoid it at all costs.