This Body

[Inag]

But it doesn't have to be either/or - either go and allow yourself to be abused, or not go and get sicker. It can be go, and tolerate the disturbing memories for as long as is needed to preserve your health

Amen! Therapy isn't easy at all. It's very hard, very hard work, hurts very much, throws you around quite a bit, triggering, crazy, makes you feel like you're going insane a lot of the time, frustrating, emotions far and wide.....and then some, fighting your own head, fighting with your own, distorted thoughts. I could go on. But it's all well, well worth it!

 

[Lozico]

Dissociative disorders are not rare, honey.

I have not read the whole thread. This website may help you as it has helped me

Dissociation help, support and training from PODS

 

[AjewuPibemu]

We can see the need for a middle ground. We have done some hard work ourselves (without a therapist) to be able to function better in what are called "activities of daily living." We also see that there is more work to be done.

Yes, we can and will attempt this coming doctor appointment because of the pressing physical issue that needs addressing. We may have to break things down into smaller appointments and smaller pieces with which to cope; the issue is finding a doctor who is willing to take the time and patience to do so.

Thank you for all the comments and for the links. We are grateful. We feel support.

 

[AjewuPibemu]

We went to the doctor. We have to have a surgery. We want to hide. Can we go away now?

 

[Lodegan]

Can we go away now?

Nope you can't. You *all* are my friend! ;)

What kind of surgery?

 

[Jusife]

@ajewu...

You sound very afraid.
We are here for you.
Do you want to tell us about what is happening?
We will listen.
We care.:hug:

 

[Rube]

This is a safe place. We don't make judgments but offer sincere support. We hear your pain, we hear you asking for support for all of you. Do you have a main being that controls and monitors everyone else? Can they be present to fill in more history so that we can extend compassion and more direction. It's great that all of you is moving towards healing. It means that other medical professionals aren't doing their job in a way that is helping you. Feel safe and free here.

 

[Uhihoj]

This is a safe place.

No it isn't and people saying that drives me nuts. Though well monitored, it is still the world wide web.

We don't make judgments but offer sincere support.

There are some that judge. Some have a lot of empathy and some have none (or not much).

We hear your pain, we hear you asking for support for all of you.

Some don't hear much, especially pain.

My point was not to talk down about the site as I am extremely fond of this site and find, for the most part, that those statements are true.

However, a collective "we" means 100% of people on the site and just like in real life, the people here have seperate, a lot of the time differenting, opinions, seperate issues, seperate ideas, and varying degrees of empathy and sympathy. Some are "you poor thing, come here and lay your head on me" and some are "get your ass up and move". Most fit somewhere in between; that I've experienced anyway.

Not all are needed 100% of the time. Take what helps and leave the rest. But all can potienally help and none are wrong. But don't have a false sense of security here. Or a false sense of safty.

Anyway, OP, there is also DDNOS:

Dissociative Disorder: Not Otherwise Specified (NOS) | Psych Central

DDNOS is no longer reconized since 2013 in the DSM V and has been updated to:

“Other Specified” and “Unspecified” Dissociative Disorders | Psych Central

Wanted to advise about the later DDNOS as there is a lot of information on here about it and many here diagnosed with it.

It's all basically a "looser" diagnosis so if you don't fit DID fully, you can gain an "unspecifed" or "other specified" disagnosis.

I don't think its a close call and it sounds like DID to me but I am not a Dr so I wanted to advise that there are other more loose diagnosis.

 

[AjewuPibemu]

There are tumours growing in this body. The doctor wants to take out the parts that have the tumours. They are big tumours (tennis ball sized). The doctor wants faster decisions and we need time to think, talk to ourselves, research, ask questions, rest and sleep. We do not do fast, that is confusing and causes anxiety.

We understand a bit about safety (and vulnerability): sometimes circling the wagons under the cloak of anonymity is best.

 

[Hawiv]

The doctor wants faster decisions and we need time to think, talk to ourselves, research, ask questions, rest and sleep. We do not do fast, that is confusing and causes anxiety.

Sometimes there isn't time to think, research etc when speaking about tumors. I understand as I am a natural researcher. I want to heavily research and make an educated decision but when speaking about tumors, a lot of the time it is do it now or it will be too late. Too late meaning the tumors grew/spread. Also, they need to find out if its cancer and if it is then the longer you wait the less abilty they have to save your life.

Lots of tumors and cancer in my family.

I'm sorry to hear about the tumors! That's scary! I'm sure it's causing a lot of confusion and anxiety amoung your identities. :hug:

 

[AjewuPibemu]

We don't want a surgery. We don't want to be in hospital, where we get put on pills that don't help because staff/nurses/doctors don't or won't understand us and don't or won't take time to, so pills are easier for them. We don't want to eat the nasty food.

It's so confusing right now. We tried to remember and write down important things and plans, but we didn't do very well. We don't even know if there is another appointment or test; one moment we were in the treatment room and the next at home.

 

[Zimaz]

Do you have someone who can support you as it does sound like you need someone with you on a regular basis?