Childhood Throwing Tantrums/lashing Out

[Stills]

Hey guys...its been a little while. I've been managing well..not really getting where I need with my T, but I need to sit down and write it out and just gain the courage. I'm afraid to be too vulnerable because it's so painful..and right now, I've been crying for days about it. Just so many images flashing through my mind and feeling like a child. For instance, after my exam, a classmate invited everyone out for dinner and drinks. I felt that it was inappropriate, and that I'm a child, I can't go out with these adults..so then I further isolate myself because of how I feel with other people right now. I'm just struggling right now, but I'm trying, and I'm doing okay. I have to learn to deal with my outbursts because I can't be feeling like this. Can anyone relate?

 

[Bristol]

Hey guys...its been a little while. I've been managing well..not really getting where I need with my T,...

I can totally relate to this, im currently fighting the urge to throw a huge tantrum, karate chop all the christmas cards and knock the tree over lol glad im not alone!

 

[Missycat]

I can totally relate too. It was feeling and behavling like this that finally pushed me to get help - well also that my partner had also had enough of my anger and tantrums.
My anger and frustration stemmed from CSA and ongoing flashbacks and night terrors. Since going into therapy i have been able to better manage my outbursts but sometimes they take over ie completely emptying my wardrobe in a rage because i couldnt fold one of my t-shirts !
Ive found using deep breathing and mindfulness helps me stay calm when i feel the 'urge' or the wave of anger coming over me.

 

[Ronin]

Well, what helps you think the 'I'm a child, BUT I can go with them and have fun too' route?

^ Is the one I try whenever I slide, to whichever mess of a child mindset. How to be a kind of a child the more reasonable & adult appropriate company would *want* to be around. There's a 'child' and there's 'childish'. I can be a child without being childish, and I can be childish in socially acceptable ways that help whole the company, without ruining their time or mine.

 

[Stills]

I appreciate all of your responses. Thank you so much...Glad to know I'm not alone. I have practiced deep breathing while stating my name, age, and DOB. It just doesn't feel like enough :( I also hate the holidays, and I know it's a triggering time for a lot of people.

 

[Bristol]

I appreciate all of your responses. Thank you so much...Glad to know I'm not alone. I have practiced dee...

The other thing that sometimes works is really stamping your feet, bare feet on cold stone floors are my favorite, really satisfying and helps let some of the pressure out