Social anxiety-need advice

[Amanda]

Hello, I am a 23 year old female with a 2 year old son and husband. I was sexually and physically abused as a child by family members. I have been diagnosed in the past with ptsd and generalized anxiety disorder. I never have let anyone presribe me with any medications because I was afraid being dependant on them to solve my problems and I use to be a drug addict. This has been a bumpy road for me and I feel like I've only got so far with it all. My husband came from a similiar backround and we were both drug addicts with dead end jobs when we met. He ended up going to jail for awhile from all that. When my son was born, we both decided to turn our lives around for him. We stopped doing drugs and started a cleaning business. Weve come very far with all of this. Its been three years since we started and now we have a good reputation and getting very busy. Its starting to become a problem. Besides our customers and family to a point, we have cut off any people. We havent been social in the last few years and get very nervous around people. Weve been loners. I feel so overwhelmed by all of this. Between feeling cut off from the social world and not being able to talk to other people like a normal person. I have trouble even talking on facebook. I just feel self conscience and awkward. I am also nervous because I am going to have to hire someone to help us and I cant depend on family members to help. The last few months, I have been waking up every morning with a tight chest and my heart racing. Ive had a few panic attacks on top of it. I am having problems sleeping and my stomach has been killing me. I havent had this bad of anxiety since I got off drugs. I know I have trouble with change and just having a hard time adapting to all of this. I probably sound stupid. I have a lot of things to be thankful it just seems like every time I start to get better my issues start to get in the way. I love my husband but he isnt helpful because he has his own issues. If anyone has been through this, I would appreciate any advice or how youve dealt with these kind of situations.

 

[Justmehere]

Welcome to the forums! You don't sound stupid. Congrats on all your huge success.

The stress of being isolated and busy with a growing bussiness can lead to symptoms spiking. This explaination here might help: The Ptsd Cup Explanation

There are other options to treat symptoms like what you're experiencing other than medications. I am very leery of anti-anxiety meds too. Have you thought about seeing a therapist?

 

[AmandaT]

I have had a couple therapists. I had one when I was 13 for about a year and it did help me alot when it came to dealing with flashbacks. I tried it again a couple years ago but I didn't have a lot of time between work and taking care of my son.

 

[Buck1130]

Hey Amanda,

You don't sound stupid at all. You sound like a person who is trying to work through their anxiety. I have the same troubles and feel like I'm going to freak out sometimes. There are a few basic things that I do to make myself feel better and help me to get though the day, and physical activity is one of them (not knowing if you already exercise). I started training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu about a year ago and have benefited from that, big time! I'm not saying that you need to start martial arts but physical activity (running, hiking, biking) can be very beneficial. Not only do you gain the health benefits but you relieve stress and promote the production of endorphins. After I finish training I typically find myself driving to work or back home without a care in the world. I feel like a new person. Once the effects wear off I simply repeat. Hope this helps

-Buck

Hello, I am a 23 year old female with a 2 year old son and husband. I was sexually and physically abused as a child by...

 

[AmandaT]

Hey Amanda,

You don't sound stupid at all. You sound like a person who is trying to work through thei...

Thank you. I don't do much real exercise but I have a cleaning company so at work I am constantly active. Its not real exercise but it sure feels it by the end of the day. I just get worn out. Maybe I need to start finding stuff like that to do at home to distract myself from getting panicky.

 

[Buck1130]

Yeah, that's another good way to look at it, "distraction". Usually that panicky feeling I get is the indicator for me to go workout, train, or run. It definitely distracts me from all of the other B.S. going on and gets rid of the anxiety that I'm feeling at that time.

 

[AmandaT]

Yeah, that's another good way to look at it, "distraction". Usually that panicky feeling I get is the...

Do you get anxious when it comes to social situations?

 

[Buck1130]

Do you get anxious when it comes to social situations?

I get anxious in all kinds of situations but certain social situations bring it out the most. I typically don't have any issues going out to eat or stopping by the grocery store. I have a hard time going to social events where I am expected to participate in B.S. conversations with people I hardly know. Usually, I get anxious overall from a build up of stress associated with all the responsibilities I have as a father, husband, employee, etc..

 

[anonymous]

My husband and I are both cautious of other people. We have been through so much together and we often feel alienated because of this, it seems like most people haven't been through the stuff we have and we don't have time to B.S., were just trying to survive.