Something tells me that the second story has been camouflaged as well. My sense is that there are many layers to this and I think it is possible that only the first layer has been peeled back. If this were me, one of the things I would do is I would start checking joint bank and credit card statements. If things seem out of whack there, I would contact an attorney just to get some advice.
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General He's Wearing His Dog Tags Again?
- Post starter CCurry
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- Post starter
- #26
Hi Guys,
We just got in from a dinner with friends of mine, David came he was okay, not great though. These friends know everything so David fessed up about everything, the Montreal lie, the hallucinations, the unexplained scissors in the wall episode. Clearly they are concerned for me but compassionate towards him too.
I think we have a clear plan until Tuesday. If he feels at any time that he may be a threat to me or the kids he will check into a nearby hotel for the night. He doesn't think he'll need to but is prepared to act on it.
He does feel that he'll probably need a major intervention to get him back to when he was coping okay with his ptsd. This is beyond a once a week T session and he knows this.
He's out for a 2 (or so he says) hour walk because if he doesn't he thinks that'll be a big problem.
Carmela
p.s. Cate-I looked into a critical incident clinic and I'll be calling them to find out more about that. Thx.
We just got in from a dinner with friends of mine, David came he was okay, not great though. These friends know everything so David fessed up about everything, the Montreal lie, the hallucinations, the unexplained scissors in the wall episode. Clearly they are concerned for me but compassionate towards him too.
I think we have a clear plan until Tuesday. If he feels at any time that he may be a threat to me or the kids he will check into a nearby hotel for the night. He doesn't think he'll need to but is prepared to act on it.
He does feel that he'll probably need a major intervention to get him back to when he was coping okay with his ptsd. This is beyond a once a week T session and he knows this.
He's out for a 2 (or so he says) hour walk because if he doesn't he thinks that'll be a big problem.
Carmela
p.s. Cate-I looked into a critical incident clinic and I'll be calling them to find out more about that. Thx.
- Moderator
- #27
Nicolette
Supporter Admin
Without divulging any details....Anthony, ex military, doesn't think wearing his dog tags again is any real issue or sign of anything to worry about.
I am sorry I have missed the rest of the conversation but I am having my own difficult time at present.
I am sorry I have missed the rest of the conversation but I am having my own difficult time at present.
D
Deleted member 541
Carmela,
With the fact that he has acknowledged he has a problem, he knows he needs help, and he is willing to do so......Your worries are almost over......I'm glad that things are going in the right direction, for him now......
This will be a long haul to get him back to where he was, but as long as he is willing to get the help, it will go quicker......If he knows that you are on this forum, please tell him for me, that I personally wanted to tell him, how strong he is, and how great it is that he is seeking the help that he needs......He has a ton of people that are pulling for him.......Be safe for the rest of the weekend, and I hope it goes smoothly, with no more worries.....
With the fact that he has acknowledged he has a problem, he knows he needs help, and he is willing to do so......Your worries are almost over......I'm glad that things are going in the right direction, for him now......
This will be a long haul to get him back to where he was, but as long as he is willing to get the help, it will go quicker......If he knows that you are on this forum, please tell him for me, that I personally wanted to tell him, how strong he is, and how great it is that he is seeking the help that he needs......He has a ton of people that are pulling for him.......Be safe for the rest of the weekend, and I hope it goes smoothly, with no more worries.....
- Post starter
- #29
Hi Nicolette, I'm sorry that you're having a difficult time at this moment, I hope that you're able to bounce back quickly.
The dog tags are only the cusp of what's happening, they represent nothing but everything. It's where he is in his mind right now. Knowing what's been happening last night was a restless sleep for me, I slept with a pillow on my head (like that was going to help anyway).
SheCat- thanks for that, you're right the fact that he knows he needs help is huge. Now that everything is out in the open, his hallucinations that are real in his mind, the fact that he doesn't trust himself 100 percent that he won't hurt me, the kids or anyone at least he'll be forced on Tuesday to get assessed. I say Tuesday because Monday is Thanksgiving day holiday here in Canada.
Luckily nobody walked into his office because God only knows where those scissors would have ended up.
- Post starter
- #30
He did it, he had to remove himself from our home. I knew he was teetering all day, I can tell by the way he walked with his arms wrapped around his body trying to comfort or soothe himself. Even though he thought he'd relieve the pressure by getting a good workout in and taking a long walk to try to ground himself again, he just couldn't get there.
We went grocery shopping, I told him he didn't have to come but he wanted to get some distraction. During the check out line he told me that he's going to have to leave the house as soon as we get back--he could not hold on. I was deeply saddened to hear this but didn't say anything, instead I took my sunglasses that were sitting on my head and pulled them down over my eyes so that he and anybody else didn't see the tears.
We came home, I told him I'd be right back. I went upstairs to our master bathroom, shut the door and had a good cry. I didn't know that he came to see what I was up to. I guess that triggered him, I didn't know it, I didn't mean to but he went back down into the kitchen and started smashing things, the fridge was across the room by the time I came back downstairs. He was smashing his head and fist (and I do mean SMASHING) into the fridge and for the first time, I saw a rage that I have never seen in anybody. The best way I can describe this fury was that he looked like a wild animal thirsty for blood. I ran upstairs because I didn't know if he was in the middle of a disassociation, locked our bedroom (thank god kids were not home), sat there and cried some more and hoping that this normally well mannered man wouldn't be bounding up the stairs before he was able to settle.
He ended up calming down enough to grab his overnight back, apologized for all of this, for scaring me, for putting me through this grief but told me he'd call me in a couple of hours when he's checked himself into a hotel.
Tuesday can't come fast enough. He'll call that mental health facility and asked to be assessed again.
Life at the moment sucks!!
Carmela
We went grocery shopping, I told him he didn't have to come but he wanted to get some distraction. During the check out line he told me that he's going to have to leave the house as soon as we get back--he could not hold on. I was deeply saddened to hear this but didn't say anything, instead I took my sunglasses that were sitting on my head and pulled them down over my eyes so that he and anybody else didn't see the tears.
We came home, I told him I'd be right back. I went upstairs to our master bathroom, shut the door and had a good cry. I didn't know that he came to see what I was up to. I guess that triggered him, I didn't know it, I didn't mean to but he went back down into the kitchen and started smashing things, the fridge was across the room by the time I came back downstairs. He was smashing his head and fist (and I do mean SMASHING) into the fridge and for the first time, I saw a rage that I have never seen in anybody. The best way I can describe this fury was that he looked like a wild animal thirsty for blood. I ran upstairs because I didn't know if he was in the middle of a disassociation, locked our bedroom (thank god kids were not home), sat there and cried some more and hoping that this normally well mannered man wouldn't be bounding up the stairs before he was able to settle.
He ended up calming down enough to grab his overnight back, apologized for all of this, for scaring me, for putting me through this grief but told me he'd call me in a couple of hours when he's checked himself into a hotel.
Tuesday can't come fast enough. He'll call that mental health facility and asked to be assessed again.
Life at the moment sucks!!
Carmela
D
Deleted member 541
I had hoped that things would be ok till Tuesday. I'm sorry that it happened. I wish though that he would have checked into the nearest hospital instead of a motel. If there is any chance of getting him to check into a hospital, I would try with him.. He really is on *the edge* and needs professional help to pull him through this. He simply CAN'T do this himself.......
Please take care of yourself in the mean time.....
Please take care of yourself in the mean time.....
- Post starter
- #32
I know SheCat, that's what I suggested but since in the past he did that, walked into a hospital and checked himself in he knows what they'll do-heavily sedate him, he'll lose control over his life, etc. He just didn't want to do that even though it was the smartest option.
I still have not heard from him and I'm feeling overwhelming anxiety. He's not answering his cell, or my texts. The last text I told him if he didn't want to talk just text me back and let me know that your safe. Still nothing. I know that if I do not hear from him with a couple of hours, I'll be calling hospitals.
Tuesday is a long way off!!
I still have not heard from him and I'm feeling overwhelming anxiety. He's not answering his cell, or my texts. The last text I told him if he didn't want to talk just text me back and let me know that your safe. Still nothing. I know that if I do not hear from him with a couple of hours, I'll be calling hospitals.
Tuesday is a long way off!!
D
Deleted member 541
I think I would be worried too.........The only problem with sending him text, and making phone calls is that it will push him further into himself. But, I also worry that because he is so far out of control, I worry about self harm.......
Do you think he is capable of trying to hurt himself?????
Do you think he is capable of trying to hurt himself?????
- Post starter
- #34
You right, me calling him is probably pushing him further, I need not to but I'm just so worried. Thanks for reminding me that he's probably as you say "will push him further into himself."
He promised me that he will not take his life, he promised that so I hope that he can work through this. In the meantime, I'm having a difficult time just breathing.
D
Deleted member 541
I know it's hard. I know that we as sufferers put our carers through hell at times. We don't mean to, but to be honest... At that time, we really don't even consider how we might be hurting you, we are truly feeling like we are trying to just survive, to live, and to feel free of the pain and hurt.
Is there anyone that you can call, to come and be with you???
Is there anyone that you can call, to come and be with you???
ISupportHer
Diamond Member
Very Tough For You
I can only imagine how hard this is. I sent you another PM.
Whatever happens, please be safe! It sounds like he purposely took out his frustrations on the kitchen but you did the right thing going upstairs and locking the door whale he was out of control.
My suggestion would be along the lines of She Cat. Is there anyone you can call? A family member, friend, a pastor maybe?
I can only imagine how hard this is. I sent you another PM.
Whatever happens, please be safe! It sounds like he purposely took out his frustrations on the kitchen but you did the right thing going upstairs and locking the door whale he was out of control.
My suggestion would be along the lines of She Cat. Is there anyone you can call? A family member, friend, a pastor maybe?
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