How to handle living in same city as the cause of you ptsd

[Isagum]

I was just talking to an old friend today who knows the people who caused my PTSD, and I found out they recently moved to the same city. I mean, there are thousands of people here, but having them in the same city is freaking me out. What if I run into them at the store? What if I run into them at an event in the city?
How do you handle living in close proximity to who caused you PTSD? Do you just have to move? Do you just have to stay in your house all the time? Is there any solution to this?

 

[Olan]

I don't know. I'm dealing with something a little similar. My parents were (are) emotionally abusive and contributed greatly to my CPTSD. I live on the same property as my mother and my father lives about 30 minutes away. As I have begun to face my trauma, it has become incredibly difficult to be around them. Every time I think I might make some progress, they slap me back down into anger and pain and depression. I have no way to live anywhere else.
I really wish I could offer some sort of solution to you. I know that the constant flood of cortisone in your body from being hypervigilant and and knowing that something bad could happen at any moment, like running into those people, can cause serious health problems. So can isolating yourself until you are painfully lonely. My best wishes to you. Maybe someone here can suggest something.

 

[Temlleceie]

Most days I would love to move. It takes just more time to recover. I used to run the other direction, but now I am better prepared to protect myself.

 

[Isagum]

I have no way to live anywhere else.

Thanks for the reply. I'm sorry you're feeling so stuck with abusive people! That is so tough! I hope things change for you in the future so you can be around people who treat you right!

I used to run the other direction, but now I am better prepared to protect myself.

Thanks for the response. So learning to protect yourself helps you deal with being in the same area?

 

[Leduh]

I live in the same town as all of my rapist, I live in a bubble. I will only go to certain (2) places, otherwise I'm stuck in my house where I'm safe every day all day . Going on 2 years.

 

[Temlleceie]

@Isagum it does help to some degree, but under the circumstances when I was attacked I had no way to protect myself. I tried to fight him off, but he was stronger. I know a lot of people are anti-gun, but if I felt threatened for my life I would use it. That does help me feel safer. But, if I could I would move just because of the constant triggers.

 

[Isagum]

Going on 2 years.

That sucks! I'm sorry you're dealing with that. I want to figure out a way to not have to do that.

 

[Cinuril]

I was just talking to an old friend today who knows the people who caused my PTSD, and I found out they recently moved...

I stay in all the time but in the new year I am taking my life back and not letting the cause of my PTSD win.

 

[Esin]

What do you think about getting a stun flashlight? Were you happy before this where you live? How bad are your triggers right now? I moved to get away and although I do not have the fear of being triggered anymore it was painfully hard for me to start over and it has taken me eight years to adjust to a new home and be happy here finally.

What does your therapist say?

 

[Isagum]

I'm kind of afraid a weapon like a stun flashlight could just be taken from and used against me in a confrontation. I have liked where I live, and wouldn't want to move if I didn't have to. The main problem is just feeling stuck inside and hardly able to go any public places for fear of seeing them.
My therapist thinks I should find a way to not move, a way to not be so afraid of then,

 

[Ara]

My therapist thinks I should find a way to not move, a way to not be so afraid of then,

I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do next. I think that finding a way not to be afraid of them of would be next to impossible for me at this point in my life.

Having lived in the same situation with them running around I had beau coup triggers and never go quite over that so I was so grateful that we were eventually forced to move because my husband became so sick and we

Yet I was so lonely for the first first year after he died and I was then living alone in a new town and it is so much better for me finally, but I am slow and it took me eight years to recover and find my new life.]\

I am now very happy living in the new town. I had to leave home that I had lived in for twenty five years and I still miss it but have been able to reconcile myself finally with the new move and call this place home now.

It is not the beautiful place that I lived but I am still so scarred and not afraid anymore of running into them something I very much struggled with at the end. I was so angry I was just staring them down.

But my fears did wear thin and the triggers that were so familiar were so awful

Just know that if you do move, you are best person who determines your quality of life for you. Good luck.