Does anyone else getting weirded out . . .

[Deleted member 29920]

In my teens.. I was attracted to older women, the appeal was that they were more intelligent than younger women, not selfish etc, basically didn't have all the shitty qualities that younger people generally have. Now, in my thirty-somethings.. I don't think i'd go with anyone that's more than 7 years younger than me.. unless they were incredibly mature for their age. Still would be really wary though for various reasons. Yes it would freak me out a bit, makes me feel uncomfortable thinking about.. lord I hope that never happens actually, lol.

 

[Cyberluddite]

Online? No, because it's almost always either a bot or a catfisher... and they end up in the "honeypot" email account's spam folder. Before I left social media altogether, I had to block a lot of younger creepy stalkers (men, too).

Offline? I consider it a compliment to my self-care regimen... but I'm aware of the game, as it's no different than when I was their age. There are ways to flirt that can indicate "thanks, but no thanks." It's all in the delivery.

Things you end up learning, when you're 40-something but look late-20s.

 

[hodge]

I don't do anything online and mine too have been in person. When it reminds you of you at that age wha...

It's more about them. I could never get involved that way with someone that much younger because I'd see him as a son, but it bothers me that they're at least ostensibly looking for someone so much older, because that makes them vulnerable to abusive older people.

 

[illusionist]

Exactly my thoughts @hodge

 

[hodge]

Also, I think that until the younger person is well into their 30s, there is a power differential. I'm just speaking as someone born and raised in U.S. white European culture. I'm not getting my arms around what I mean, but I can draw an analogy -- it's why it's unethical for a supervisor in the workplace to get involved with a subordinate. There's just an automatic power differential.

 

[Deleted member 541]

@hodge. I just think it’s an asshole...... LOL!!!!!

 

[hodge]

Also, when I was 39 I married my 56-year-old husband. It's a very loving, fun and harmonious relationship, but there have been rare moments when he pulled the "I knew how to do this before you were born" thing. By that age, I was self confident enough to talk back to him whenever he pulled it, and he listened, lol. We just celebrated 16 years of marriage together.

 

[hodge]

@hodge. I just think it’s an asshole...... LOL!!!!!

It could be a bot, as someone else suggested. I don't recall getting a friend request from him, and I didn't click to check out his page, so who knows?

 

[Deleted member 541]

Wow, 16 yrs, I don’t think I could wake up to someone everyday for 16 yrs. congratulations!!!!

 

[EveHarrington]

That’s what I’m talking about!

Now that I’m in my 30’s I’m looking more at older men.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

when a person of the opposite sex who is at least 20 years younger than you comes on to you?

Yes! I'm 36 so 20 yrs would also be illegal but I feel weird if a guy comes on to me even a year younger believe it or not. I have always and will always go for much older men. I have always (even as a very young child) loved the salt and pepper hair and now that I am nearing that age it's less of an attractant. But I still aim for 40s. Mid to late 40s to be exact. My therapist looks like he is in his 40s and if he weren't my therapist I'd go for it even though I know he just had his 61st birthday. Sounds weird I know but him and his wife still look and act 40 so is that so weird? I dunno. But younger is very creepy feeling to me. I'd still go for it but am always creeped out and that would effect something at some point whether a relationship or just a f*ck buddy. Would still effect me at some point. Have no idea why. I get why I like older men but have no idea why younger, even by a small bit, creeps the f*ck out of me.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

@hodge this was happening to me regularly until I put up a drawing that my oldest grandchild drew for me. Now it never happens anymore. Block them.