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Everything is falling apart... again

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I’m on disability and finally have an apartment for a year now after a few years of on and off car living (horrible!).

My disability doesn’t even cover my whole rent. Never mind the rest of my essential bills.

There’s a job i can do whenever I want and I figured out that I only have to work like 2-3 hrs a day and that would pretty much bring me up to what I need but I can’t seem to DO IT!!

I’m so mad with myself. I’m on meds for anxiety, pain management & insomnia & I’m STILL barely sleeping. So I’m exhausted during the day.

I tried sooo hats today. I went out 3 times to work but chickened out. So basically it may be evicted shortly. Although I’d never let it get that far... I’d be too embarrassed. I’d just move back into my car.

And OF COURSE I don’t have the money for my T (the only thing that is usually helpful.

I wish I was brave enough to end it all.
 
My disability doesn’t even cover my whole rent. Never mind the rest of my essential bills.

I am very worried about you right now. Can you apply for welfare? I know that you are struggling now and I realize that you are getting desperate. Can you go to a shelter instead of living in your car? I do not know what the available programs are for assistance.

Do you have enough to eat? I am really worried about. It is so cold right now. I would fear you living in your car with it being as cold as it is.

There’s a job i can do whenever I want and I figured out that I only have to work like 2-3 hrs a day and that would pretty much bring me up to what I need but I can’t seem to DO IT!!

I really hope that something can become available to you to really help you to access whatever available resources there are for you.

I want you to be okay.:hug:
 
I’m sorry you’re struggling so much. :hug:

Can you contact your doc for a med adjustment?[/Q...
My p-doc is useless & I took myself off SSRI’s a while ago. Only xanax & sleeping pills.
Contacted my T asking if I can have a session and pay her the next time... she just responded that she’s out of town for the week and will respond when she’s able :(

I am very worried about you right now. Can you apply for welfare? I know that you are struggling now and I...
Thank you. I swallowed my pride a long time ago & am on whatever the government deems me fit for.

Don’t worry about the cold, I live in a (mostly) perpetually warm place. And shelters... I can’t share my space with anyone. Too many unknowns.
 
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