My wife got herself involved with an online catfish, and got my younger daughter involved in 3 way conversation with him, where she was saying things like "my mom wants to see your penis", with no repercussion from my wife.
Can your daughter take screen shots of this? This is really dangerous and damaging behavior on the part of your wife and him. I’d be very worried for the safety and well being of your kids. I’m actually quite concerned you are not taking greater action on this. You clearly want to understandably protect yourself... but what about your kids?
Rape trauma survivors recant from time to time, and the recording your friend made may not protect you as much as you would like. It may not have even be made in a legal manner. In some states and some countries, tape recording someone else without their permission can be a crime.
It’s not direct or common symptom of PTSD to engage in 3 way sexual conversations with your child. Is it trauma fueled behavior? Possibly. But it could be manic or a personality disorder or etc. The fact that a doctor indicated this was more than PTSD years ago shows that this chaos isn’t all that new, and you may have gotten used to some very abnormal behaviors that are very unhealthy.
Plus, she is not doing the work to recover, and if she does, I’d expect it to take years to get some of this under control.
Crisis lines can be a mixed bag. They are good to calm a crisis, sometimes. They are not really good at on-going support or sorting out legal liabilities.
Developing PTSD from a false rape accusation is unlikely - but to develop depression and etc? Totally possible.
What is known for sure is that you are deeply struggling. I'd be a basket-case if my partner of many years falsely accused me of rape.
She’s accusing you of rape and exposing your kids to sexualized behavior and you still are trying to help her? I commend you for such compassion, but not getting professionals involved to help you may lead to greater harm to you and your kids.
